Satsvarupa dasa Goswami Maharaja
Spiritual Family CelebrationSaturday, July 5, 2025
What
Meeting of Disciples and friends of SDG
Where
The Veterans of Foreign Wars Hall
845 Hudson Avenue
Stuyvesant Falls, New York 12173There is plenty of parking near the Hall. The facility is just a few minutes’ walk from SDG’s home at 909 Albany Ave.
Schedule
10:00 – 10:30 A.M. Kirtana
10:30 – 11:15 A.M. Presentation by Satsvarupa Maharaja
11:15 – 12:30 P.M. Book Table
12:30 – 1:15 P.M. Arati and kirtana
1:15 — 2:15 P.M. Prasadam FeastContact
Baladeva Vidyabhusana at [email protected] or (518) 754-1108
Krsna dasi at [email protected] or (518) 822-7636SDG: “I request as many devotees as possible to attend so we can feel the family spirit strongly. I become very satisfied when we are all gathered together.”
******
Śrī Caitanya-caritāmṛta, Madhya-līlā 20.124–125: “O great learned devotee, although there are many faults in this material world, there is one good opportunity—the association with devotees. Such association brings about great happiness. . . . .”
Srila Prabhupāda: “Therefore, our Society is association. If we keep good association, then we don’t touch the darkness. What is the association? There is a song, sat-saṅga chāḍi’ kainu asate vilāsa, te-kāraṇe lāgila mora karma-bandha-phāṅsa (Gaurā Pahū, verse 3). Sat-saṅga. Sat-saṅga means association with the devotees. So the one poet, Vaiṣṇava poet, is regretting that, ‘I did not keep association with the devotees, and I wanted to enjoy life with the nondevotees. Therefore I’m being entangled in the fruitive activities.’ Karma bandha phāṅsa. Entanglement.” [Conversation with David Wynne, July 9, 1973, London]
If you would like to help, please contact Kṛṣṇa-bhajana dāsa at [email protected] or [email protected] and we will find you a service that utilizes your talents.
Japa Quotes from Begging for the Nectar of the Holy Names (Part 7)
We have always heard that the goal is krsna-prema, and that it will only descend by the mercy of the Vaisnavas—all the Vaisnavas, even the ones we work with now in ISKCON—but especially the liberated souls. Therefore, I have no other recourse but to keep endeavoring, to keep chanting.
******
Although at present, I have to give my main attention to hearing the syllables of the maha-mantra, I know that the maha-mantra is an ocean of rasa. If I can just continue to stand on the beach of that ocean with faith, I too will one day enter the waters. By doing this basic work of trying to improve one’s attentiveness in chanting, Krsna will be pleased to award us more. Prabhupada will be pleased. He used to quote his spiritual master: “Don’t try to see Krsna, but act in such a way that Krsna sees you.”
******
My dear mind, even if you cannot immediately pick up the spirit of Raghunatha dasa Gosvami’s instructions in the later verses of Manah-siksa, at least you should understand the goal. You and I have been together for many, many lifetimes, and we will continue to travel together until we are completely spiritualized. Let us be inspired by hearing the instructions of a real devotee to his mind, and I pray that you will get the idea soon.
******
Hopeful statements that I will personally attain krsna-prema are confirmed by the sastras. Pure devotional service is a continuous path from bhava-bhakti to raganuga to prema. Even in the beginning stage, when we work under the guidance of the pure devotee, because we possess the seeds of krsna-prema, the watering process of chanting and hearing will eventually result in ripened fruit.
******
There is no real duality or disparity between my hard work in chanting and the ability to remember Krsna during japa. It is just a matter of perseverance and mercy. We cannot prematurely bring the two aspects of japa together, but neither should we be bewildered as to why we are not yet at a more advanced stage or think that that later stage is forever unattainable.
******
All glories to Srila Rupa Gosvami, whose picture is before me chanting japa under a blossoming kadamba tree. That tree is blooming in response to Rupa Gosvami’s ecstasies. Rupa Gosvami is happy to see Radha and Krsna unite and unhappy when Radharani suffers in separation from Krsna. And here is the photo of Prabhupada on the wall of the van. It is the one where he is sitting on an old-fashioned wooden chair. There is a calendar from the “Calcutta Trading Company” up on the wall behind him. Srila Prabhupada is serene, his arms are thin, the corners of his mouth are downturned. And he too, like Rupa Gosvami, has his right hand in a white japa bead bag. They are my preceptors.
******
The sun is up now and I have chanted sixteen rounds. If this were my normal routine, I would be finished chanting for the day. I would prefer to do something else in Krsna’s service. Or I might want to chant, but there wouldn’t be time. It doesn’t seem right, however, to get the rounds done and out of the way before breakfast and then not return to it for another twenty-four hours.
******
I still cannot hear, although I am continually trying. I stood for awhile amid a group of small trees and gazed at the branches arching over the road. I was thinking of something or other, but then I thought that that time could have just as easily been spent chanting and hearing the Hare Krsna mantra. Just catch yourself doing something else and say, “Excuse me please, but is this more important than chanting?” Or, “Excuse me, but I am going to use this moment to actually hear the holy names.”
pp. 418-21
The rains came.
And it was a good time for writing.
On the roofless part of the second floor
sometimes he would be dictating
when a downpour came,
his men would rush him out of the rain,
to continue indoors.
He could hold the Dictaphone microphone
only with difficulty now
and the sound of his speech was faint
but the purport came out as strong as ever
describing the Tenth Canto.
When Krsna gave to the monkeys
from Mother Yashoda’s stock of yogurt,
the neighbor ladies complained,
Your Child is stealing at our houses,
sometimes pinching our children.
And one time He showed His mother
all the universes in His mouth,
“although she could not clearly ascertain the cause.”
Prabhupada wrote within the spiritual world,
conveying to all
reality beyond the wall of matter,
through unalloyed love of Krsna
as known by Mother Yasoda.
As the sacred Ganges was carried
down through the heavenly planets
by thousands of flying messengers,
so Prabhupada carried
the lila of Goloka
into this world
through thousands of printed books
entering through the station
of his Raman Reti house.
An old man could not have done it.
From undisturbed Goloka
he was brought down
to the violent world of maya
when he heard the news—
an attack on his temple in Mayapur.
Three hundred Muslims had overrun the premises
breaking the hands of a gurukula teacher,
cutting Nitai Chand’s head in three places,
breaking lights and wires,
storming toward the temple room—
when Bhavananda Goswami fired a shotgun,
he was arrested
and with other devotees was now in jail.
The newspapers were playing it up
that a Hare Krsna person had fired a gun,
and they mentioned Prabhupada who
had not been present at the time.
Prabhupada’s response was as certain
as Krsna’s killing of Kamsa;
his men would soon turn out the victors
but he also lamented,
“The gunda (hoodlum) class of men
don’t like Caitanya Mahaprabhu.”
Haridas Thakur’s refusal to enjoy
a beautiful woman at the dead of night—
the whole modern world
will fail to understand.
They will say,
“What is wrong with illicit sex?
What is wrong with intoxication?
What is wrong with slaughtering cows?”
“They mentioned I wasn’t present,
or they would have arrested me.
These are the people we are preaching to.
They say we are brainwashing!
How difficult it is!
But we have to push on.”
And he cried thinking of
his Mayapur men,
Krsna would protect them
who were giving everything
to serve Him.
The terrible event
stayed on his mind,
but in ensuing days
the truth came out
and the people of Navadvip
turned against the gundas.
Another attack,
another storm weathered,
fair skies again
for the Bengal preaching—
but Prabhupada’s health,
although not yet at the end,
improved not at all
through the end of July,
although his writing went well
through the month of rains
with more than half the year gone.
pp. 43-46
Desire to be serious in KC. But what can you actually achieve? Lacking the higher taste, how concentrated can you be, say, to read only Srila Prabhupada’s books, or chanting extra rounds?
For example, you’re not going to go to GBC Godbrothers and ask for an assignment, stating your inability to know what’s best for you. You’re not going to settle in one place and preach there as a prabhu-datta-desa. Your health doesn’t allow you to visit many more places and give more lectures. You can still only go to places that are sympathetic to your condition of headaches and the likelihood of cancelling scheduled programs.
Limited.
Pausing in my writing life. You say I could give up this allopathic medication, so maybe I could give up free-writing. Maybe it’s not the best thing. Why say something like that? Why not continue to do it? Is there another way for me to write? Then, what comes to mind?
…. I don’t have a soaring spirit. I don’t want to ruin myself flying too near the sun. I want to give people the best thing coming down. Hare Krishna. But you need to shape things. You want to be an ISKCON preacher. You write too much. Give it up.
We are here in this place, I keep forgetting how to spell it – Albarella. It is Italian. A quiet place. They have guards and it’s very strict. But the people who own the house next door just came and they were measuring their cement walk with a tape measure. I hope they don’t come back and make noise. I am sorry, folks, I don’t have the epidermis or I.Q. to make a big fuss. Just telling you this day, second one without constant pain. Krsna is giving me an easy time. But at night maybe I can’t sleep so well.
I wish to be the poet of pure taste….A tiny reciprocator and follower of my Guru Maharaja. But I don’t want to offend other Vaisnavas or any living entity. Therefore, this is the way to do it, to toot the horn of remorse over your offenses.
Before anyone passes away ask forgiveness, and before I pass away get it straight. Don’t want to have songs on the brain that will bring me to Bach-loka rather than Krsnaloka. Put on a simple bhajana of Hare Krsna tunes and that will be better. May the Lord protect you. May you be blessed, head and foot, and not with mouth disease. Keep clear of drunkards and women with bad intentions. If they spear you, don’t cry out, or cry out hoping to remember the names of Krsna. The poem is hard gained, the head is okay so far, it is Ekadasi and so, you could chant.
They said you had a dream that your Srila Prabhupada told you to read only his books. Deny it? Well, I don’t recall a dream per se but I did get a pull from his direction to come back to his lotus feet and I wrote about this in Prabhupada Samadhi Diary just published as the last section of Churning the Milk Ocean.
Oh, you are a proud creature. You should just serve your master and actually get into his books more and more and like to lecture. I am doing it. I hope to get better at it. Do something he will be pleased with. Hare Krsna.
Madhu’s coming to read to me from Cc. Some fog in my head. Don’t imagine you’re all ready to travel to lots of temples. I did think maybe I could sneak in a visit to Matsya Avatara’s. But looked at the map – Pisa is far out of our way. We’re planning to stay here until Govardhana Puja day, then on the same day travel west and south of Italy to Avignon, France, in two days. There’s a devotee there, Padasevana, who’ll give us more attention than the doctor in Italy. The theme for this “book” is recovery.
Some letters will come and I’ll answer them.
Not writing much each day, partly due to headaches and also a lack of drive. Also, a deliberate pausing rather than headlong plowing into free-writing.
My purpose in Albarella is already achieved – to stop the pills. But I’m still weak. Not that you kick the pills and two days later you certify yourself strong enough to travel and preach.
But then what’s the purpose? Day by day see what other bad habits you might quit. Be patient – a renunciation of that which isn’t favorable to Krsna consciousness.
See, this is all naked, diary stuff.
I don’t have a long-term theme as in Pada-yatra. The theme is health recovery, but that also is material, body care.
pp. 20-24
You don’t challenge or disbelieve. You want and hope the day will come when it’s clear and you accept. Even Srila Prabhupada couldn’t understand why his Guru Maharaja ordered that a snake be killed, but years later he saw the verse in Seventh Canto Srimad-Bhagavatam that even sadhus are pleased when a scorpion (like Hiranyakashipu) is killed.
Yes, yes. Wait for the day. In the meantime be kind to the people in your life.
On the road he walked and paused and Krsna gave him an idea: if you really want to praise the Lord and His devotees and not make trouble, He will help you. You can become His instrument just as so many devotees are instruments now and were in the past. It’s open for whoever is willing to sacrifice selfish sense grat and false ego and do God’s work in this world.
I’m alone in the house? Is someone angry, annoyed, bored? We didn’t want it that way. Bring it to Krsna. Say, “Here’s my little song. Wow, I’m sorry it was so splayed out. I did enjoy being with You under the lights in black ink.”
There’s the hollow sound
the man alone—
how would it sound?
To the crowd
I mean the group
of disciples
they’d flip out
they laugh
alone alone there’s
the man on the street
lower
depths
suffering
those Bombay
movie stars.
Please leave me alone.
The dog is put out—
don’t pet him.
The cat is gone.
Don’t refrain or
interrupt
they’re talking and
displaying a fierce
determination.
They leave me alone to
roam
in a schoolroom with chalk
boards to myself
to practice
on Danish
radio
a truck driver says
“What the hell is that?
“Hare Krsna is not popular,”
a mouse screams.
Hare Krsna is one of
many even in a Mumbai
Back to Godhead magazine.
Anyway we get
our quota
small or large.
And this is it
scream
descend
it’s over.
Thanks for the soya custard and the fruit. Thank you for the intelligence to wash the stainless steel Deity dishes. Thank you for telling us the body is only a covering, that the self never dies and is never born, that he’s eternal. Thank you for telling us that Lord Krsna wants to love us in His abode. Chant His names. Chanting His names is as good as being with Krishna face to face if you chant sincerely.
Yeah, “Krsna is the Lord,” my words. Put on boots and jacket and pants, drink in the air. You can’t be so awake, ecstatic, can hardly think of anything to say but a little weather report or name a flower or two. Complaints in ankle and maybe head again, but it’s good. You better be bye bye Krsna, hold up your arms and say, “Take me. I did what I did and You are merciful. Just give another chance to serve You. You are in charge. I don’t have to understand.”
O wise one,
I’ve lost you.
No, you’re right here
beside me.
We’re going for the bonanza—
my desire to open my
entire self with all
feelings at the lotus
feet of the wise one.
You’re the dearest,
my eternal father.
Come back to me.
What did I do wrong?
Swallowed and swallowed
my disappointments.
Please give me the vision
again. I am your child
at your feet
off the streets.
I didn’t want to climb
the ladder, and yet I
did. I just wanted
to be one of the apples
of your eye.
That’s natural. But
now here I am,
too dead to even
notice my loss.
Is this true? Is this
how I feel? I
can’t feel, wise one.
I’m too far out
on a limb.
Intellectually I think
I see it. Now let’s
think of ways to unwind
it,
go so far into it I lose
control and it grabs me
and I cry for your mercy
and strength,
clear
direction.
For me, it doesn’t seem possible to accomplish full spiritual development by reading and chanting, although they help me maintain at least a bare spiritual life.
I only cried in a dream after his disappearance. I’ve not been able to let go to all the disappointments. Why did you have to leave the Lower East Side and expand the Krsna consciousness movement? That was the first blow. We wanted you always with us. It was hard to take. Oh yes, “separation.” We learned it and I remained dedicated in Boston, even in Dallas, and when you called me as your personal servant. Something happened unpleasant there because I couldn’t take such close physical intimacy, and the pace you set, and seeing the freedom the other sannyasis had—so I asked to be transferred. But I became lively again with the traveling library party and reading your books. But then gradually, it became too big, there was too much politics among your leaders….. You needed men who could collect money and construct and manage. That was the spiritual life you wanted. Oh, you wanted us to follow four rules and become pure devotees. And you traveled all over the world to see new centers, keeping always in touch with the three huge projects in India.
Now I’m forlorn. I used to be at least one of the most avid readers of your books. Now I don’t read them, although I hear tapes. I have to cry, dig up all this loss.….. I have lost my Srila Prabhupada. I’ve become so hardened to the pain of that loss that I don’t even feel it. But I am his son. He is the most important person in my life. The one I love the most, the one I am most loyal to. But bit by bit I became estranged from him, even while he was alive. Now I have to recover that connection.
pp. 77-81
A writer of pieces talks to God. He tells the Lord he loves Him, and the Lord reciprocates. The “writer” is the servant, and Kṛṣṇa is the Master. My friend B. is undergoing a hip replacement at this moment. We pray for his well-being.
The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want;
He makes me down to lie in green pastures.
He leads me beside still waters,
He restores my soul.
He leads me in paths of righteousness
for His name’s sake.
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I fear no evil;
for Thou art with me;
Thy rod and Thy staff,
they comfort me….
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
all the days of my life;
and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord
forever.
—David, Psalm 23, “The Divine Shepherd”
A high-class paṇḍita-Vaiṣṇava said of me, “He has written amply about Śrīla Prabhupāda.” I was afraid that the book of mine he was reading didn’t have enough about Śrīla Prabhupāda in its pages. But he said I’d done enough. I want to write more about Śrīla Prabhupāda, and from the heart, not artificially. I need to remember my spiritual master with love day and night, and I need to serve him.
The most beautiful female presence in all the worlds is Śrīmatī Rādhārāṇī. The greatest male of all is Śrī Kṛṣṇa. All women worship Him. But Rādhā dominates Kṛṣṇa; He is like Her plaything.
Due to daily sharp headaches and frequent migraines, I fail to decently fulfill the daily quota of sixteen rounds as given by our spiritual master A. C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupāda. This is a falldown. For decades I have kept the quota, and did it nicely. Once I had a migraine crash that lasted some sixteen years, and during that time I was unable to keep the quota. I finally recovered, and returned to doing it nicely, chanted well for decades. But now! I have fallen down again and am in the midst of a near year-long inability to keep my quota—again it is due to migraines, which come almost daily in the form of hours-long sharp pangs behind the right eye. Chanting the sixteen round quota is the most essential instruction of the spiritual master. I am here praying again, to be free of this terrible affliction.
Haridāsa Ṭhākura could defeat māyā because he was absorbed in thoughts of Kṛṣṇa by constantly chanting His holy name (Cc. Antya 3.250, purport).
If one chants even for one week, he will make solid progress in spiritual life.
If one takes to Caitanya Mahāprabhu’s method, chanting Hare Kṛṣṇa, the first installment of gain will be ceto-darpaṇa-mārjanam: all the dirty things will be cleansed from the heart simply by chanting. Chant. There is no expenditure, and there is no loss. If one simply chants for one week, he will see how much he will progress in spiritual knowledge.
—The Science of Self-Realization, Chapter 5
Ken Burns, the world-famous filmmaker, told on his own film the effect A Love Supreme by John Coltrane had on him. He said he played it constantly, deeply absorbed. I played the record album also at all times. I phoned my sister and told her with enthusiasm about hearing A Love Supreme had changed me from an agnostic to a theist. She mocked me and didn’t believe it. And then I had told the actual event. I was walking from my workplace to my home for lunch when I saw a little piece of paper in a match store. It was an announcement to A. C. Bhaktivedanta Swami’s three-times-a-week class on Bhagavad-gītā. I was only somewhat interested in the Gītā, but at once I attended his first class and never left. I followed all the rules and regulations of his movement and followed my vow to him to chant sixteen rounds of Hare Kṛṣṇa every day. So, there was a connection between The John Coltrane Quartet and A Love Supreme—and my coming to my savior, Śrīla Prabhupāda.
******
Is, or was, there a connection between most of my heroes in my former life, especially the great authors and musicians—even though they were not outright spiritual people, and even though they were not devotees of Kṛṣṇa, to my becoming a follower of Prabhupāda?
This question was very important to me, because I wanted there to be a connection and not have to dismiss my life prior to Hare Kṛṣṇa as something fictional or of no consequence. Swāmījī satisfied me when he answered that question by saying, “Their sincerity is their God consciousness.” At the time of my evolution in ISKCON, his answering of that question was sufficient, and I was happy.
I was satisfied and deeply happy that he had used the word “sincerity.” Certainly, these musicians were sincere, “and that was their God consciousness.” I lived with that definition for a long time until I grew more mature in Kṛṣṇa consciousness. Sincerity and improvisation, spontaneity.
I was simultaneously being convinced of Swāmījī by his sincerity and his improvisation, his spontaneity. And as I was being won over and loving him by these traits of his, so he said, with all sincerity, that he was loving me. More and more as the days went by, I loved him, and he loved me. And our mutual love for each other was helped to grow from a seed of A Love Supreme, into the full-blown mantra, Hare Kṛṣṇa Hare Kṛṣṇa Kṛṣṇa Kṛṣṇa Hare Hare / Hare Rāma Hare Rāma Rāma Rāma Hare Hare. For me and for thousands of devotees, Swāmījī, Prabhupāda, was the bearer of the love supreme, and still he is today. He lives forever.
pp. 50-52
My Dear Satsvarupa,
Please accept my blessings. I am in due receipt of both of your letters, one dated July 31, 1969 and the other August 2, 1969. The letter of August 2nd appears to be a practical proposal. The calculations for the house are nice. But everything should be done very carefully. If the landlord allows you to take possession of the house on payment of $12,000 on the terms and conditions as stated by you, then you must enter the house immediately, and we take it for granted it is Krishna’s offer. As far as you having to pay $6,000 down payment by October, from your calculation it appears that you shall be able to pay it. So in that case, the money paid by Giriraj may be deposited in a separate bank account for this purpose. If things go on according to your calculation, this opportunity must be taken; but I am always afraid of persons like Mr. Payne. You know the incident in New York how the real estate man, Payne, entrapped us by $6,000. I think Giriraj’s father is a lawyer, so he can help you in this connection, or any other lawyer friend. So if things are done very carefully, this scheme is approved by me. If they will give you immediate occupation of the house, and if there are no other tenants there, then it is all right. But if there are tenants, it will be botheration. We cannot deal with tenants, so if they are there, you may not accept it. But if the house is occupied by ourselves only, then it is all right. I think Giriraj is a very intelligent boy, so do everything carefully, and let me know the result. If this house can be occupied as our own, then the press department may be established in Boston immediately. If I go to New York on my way to Europe, then most probably I will stop at Boston also to see the new house. So do everything very carefully, and I shall await your further report in this connection.
Please offer my blessings to the others. I hope this will meet you in good health.
Your ever well-wisher,
A.C. Bhaktivedanta SwamiP.S. I have also received another letter by Special delivery. So everything is Krishna’s Grace. Take the risk for Krishna but do everything very diligently. I sanction it.
We were moving forward to purchase the new house. It seemed like such a great deal. Prabhupāda liked the idea of a bigger building and in this letter, mentions that perhaps the ISKCON Press would be moved to Boston. It’s obvious from this letter that he went over my calculations on how we would pay for the house, and of course, he reminded me of the time we were cheated in New York by Mr. Payne. Prabhupāda trusted us to negotiate this deal on ISKCON’s behalf, but he was also aware of how easily we could be cheated.
Our real estate agent’s name was Mr. MacDonald. He was a cheater, an Irish-American, crass and materialistic. He came from South Boston, and he reminded us of a tough, cheap, foulmouthed gangster. The owner of the house was an undertaker. He had used the house to showcase his coffins and to store his supplies. (I still remembering finding bottles of embalming liquid in the basement.) They pretended to be interested in us, but we could see through their artificiality. They seemed willing to risk us as buyers, even though it was obvious that we were all young, that none of us had money or a business, and that all we did to support ourselves was to sell magazines on the street. They probably thought they could suck some money out of us until we defaulted and then foreclose and keep their profits. When Girirāja and I met with MacDonald and the owner during a pre-purchase meeting, they suddenly told us to wait and they went outside to confer. I found it odd how they withdrew from the room and then returned in a positive spirit, ready to accept our offer.
Girirāja was careful and cautious. We expected to be cheated, so we decided to show the contract to Girirāja’s father. As far as we could see, however, it was a good deal. The house was selling for $75,000. They were giving it to us with a $12,000 down payment.
I told Prabhupāda we could earn the money by increasing our book and magazine distribution. I had held an iṣṭa-goṣṭhī with the devotees—the few of us that were there—and told them that my paycheck was the sole support of the temple. To pay for this house, we would have to increase our magazine distribution dramatically. This was at a time when the devotees had dramatically increased their distribution, but we needed still more. It was a risk, but the devotees were spirited.
We had a sweet group of devotees in Boston in those days—Nanda-kiśora and Jāhnavā, Śarādīyā and Vaikuṇṭhanātha, Jadurāṇī. All of them agreed to do the needful. It was such a good deal that we didn’t want to pass it up.
Our mortgage payments were to be over a thousand dollars a month. When we finally did move in, we were late with our payments a few months in a row. Even though Mr. MacDonald had been nice to us when we were still potential buyers, he would come by and curse us with foul language when we were late.
Finally, he and the owner called us in for a meeting at the owner’s funeral parlor. (Actually, the owner used to sell us old flowers.) The owner and Mr. MacDonald were of similar character, so it was a hard-nosed meeting. The owner told us that because we had been late twice, he was going to add an extra thousand dollars onto the purchase price as a penalty. If we didn’t agree to the increase, he would evict us immediately. “But I very much like your group and what you are doing,” he said, “and that’s why I am adding on the extra thousand dollars. You have to learn discipline. It’s for your own good.”
We assured him that we would pay on time in the future and we presented our excuses for being late, but we only gave the appearance of accepting the thousand-dollar penalty.
As soon as we returned to the temple, however, I called an ACLU lawyer named Friedman, who had helped us with problems in the past. He was young and idealistic, and when I related the details of our meeting with MacDonald and the owner, he immediately became angry and told us that MacDonald had no right to charge us an extra thousand dollars, that it wasn’t legal, and that he would do something about it. I’m sure he saw us as idealistic kids being cheated by tough businessmen.
MacDonald was furious that we had dared approach a lawyer. To make matters worse, we publicized the event by speaking about it with a reporter from Boston magazine. I spoke candidly about the initial terms under which we had purchased the property and told him about our dissatisfaction with MacDonald’s dealings. MacDonald became even more furious.
We never did fail in making our payments, although we were late once in a while. I appreciated that even from a distance, Prabhupāda knew to warn us not to trust these men despite the fact that they were so well dressed. He knew they were only interested in cheating us. At the same time, Prabhupāda encouraged us to take the risk.
pp. 107-11
Dear Friends,
May this fortunate ex-hunter speak a few words to you?
Please spare the animals’ pain, for your sake and theirs. Excuse me, but you have come to a wrong conclusion if you think that this killing of God’s creatures can go on without the killers suffering by retaliation. Please consider it. I do not wish to disturb anyone. It is a fact I come from an angry race, and I myself tend to be angry. But now I am at peace. I do not wish to blow my conchshell to spoil your savagery or to destroy your honest livelihood. Yet what kind of a life is it that takes pleasure in others’ dying? The cow, deer, rabbit, birds, and even the fish are people, although not as intelligent as you or I.
We enjoy the sunshine, a nice meal, a refreshing drink, the touch of our beloved mate, a romp through the fields when we are young, and so do these animals. (How derisively we call them “animals,” but we too have their basic traits of eating, mating, sleeping and defending. We humans are also animals, but at the same time, we are human beings, supposedly higher creatures. Where is our compassion?)
The conscience of the killer (of animals or humans) cannot be at peace. Please do not mock my words, I know I am full of faults. Please do not dispute this human and godly plea: “Do not kill.” I am not arguing to defeat anyone, nor do I present myself as an ideal example; I do not seek your votes, nor do I seek power. But I have killed many animals in this lifetime, and only by the grace of my spiritual master have I become free of it. It is therefore my duty to him to speak of this grave subject to others. Had I not stopped killing, I am convinced that I would have had to suffer in the future for the torture I inflicted on others, the dumb creatures of God.
This is the conclusion of the scriptures: Practice ahimsa, never harm others. Some who profess to follow religion are themselves steeped in blood. They justify the killing of innocent creatures as religious sacrifice, but they are wrong on this point. They are in ignorance.
If you who hear these words are even the least bit inclined to consider them, please try to detach yourselves from participation in this murder. It is quite easy to abandon murder and take up the life of nonviolence. People are taking this step in your own neighborhood. Hear from them and try to see the good in it. Do not mind if others think that you are odd. If you prefer to remain anonymous, you can privately and gradually give up directly killing creatures or buying their flesh for your food.
But do not delay. As for myself, I had a heavy karmic load on my head because I directly broke animals’ legs and left them writhing in the forest. Yet even a distant implication or agreement with the act of killing cows and other creatures carries as much responsibility as the killing itself. In this way, karma links up the guilty parties in the conspiracy. Save yourself and break free from it.
Do not face your Maker at the end of life as one who was an enemy of the animals. Do not be deluded that kindness to humans and the killing of animals can go together.
Now that I have been engaged in chanting God’s names and am no longer killing, I am a different person; I am peaceful and rectified. Still, I have dreams of the misery I caused others by the misuse of my intelligence and strength. I sometimes dream that the animals I killed are able to testify against me or to directly come and take their revenge. Yes, my dreams are a kind of mental fantasy, but if I had not given up the killing, these dreams would be indications of what is to come for one who kills.
God gives us allotted food, but this does not include wanton slaughter. We may take the pro-duction of our agriculture and the milk of the cow (which is her blood transformed, but does not require her death). All our mistakes and persistent impurities can be purified by making offerings of all we eat to the Supreme.
The sadhus of Bharata-varsa know this simple method of making devotional offerings of food to God before one eats. The potency of this act is wonderful. When we prepare foods that are acceptable according to the scriptures, and when we offer these foods with prayers of devotion to Bhagavan, then He accepts them. The food is transformed into prasadam, “God’s mercy,” and by eating we can become sanctified, rather than complicated by sin. Lord Krsna states in the Bhagavad-gita, “If one offers Me with love and devotion a leaf, a flower, fruit or water, I will accept it.” Just by this simple act, we can become pleasing to God; we can never please God by killing (or supporting the killing) of His innocent creatures.
pp. 220-27
Girirāja Mahārāja talked about the time early in his Kṛṣṇa consciousness when he asked Prabhupāda a question: “There are so many svāmīs and yogīs, how can we know which one is real?” Prabhupāda answered, “What is your goal? Do you want to be God, or do you want to be a servant of God? Kṛṣṇa is God even on the lap of His mother, Yaśodā.” (Kṛṣṇa is God in all circumstances). Prabhupāda said you can become godly, but not God.
Girirāja asked Prabhupāda, “What is it like to be with Kṛṣṇa?” Girirāja thought Prabhupāda said, “It is inconceivable.” Prabhupāda lectured at Harvard University. Girirāja remarked that the students at Harvard are very proud thinking that they are at the best university in the United States. Prabhupāda gave a wonderful lecture and then he asked for questions. Many people raised their hands. One man asked, “What good will Kṛṣṇa consciousness do?” The man referred to the Russian Revolution which benefited people. So how can KC benefit people. Prabhupāda answered, referring to the Russian Revolution. He said it might have improved the conditions of some people, but then those benefits diminished and went away (Kṛṣṇa consciousness is good for everyone eternally).
Another person at Harvard asked, “Instead of chanting Hare Kṛṣṇa wouldn’t it be just as good to count numbers?” Prabhupāda said, “You can chant numbers, but when you get tired of it, then you can chant Hare Kṛṣṇa.” The audience laughed at that statement by Prabhupāda.
Another person at Harvard asked Prabhupāda, “Have you seen God?” Prabhupāda answered, “If I falsely tell you yes, will you believe me?” Then man answered, “No” and that was the end of the questions.
Girirāja wrote Prabhupāda a letter and said he was happy in Kṛṣṇa consciousness. Prabhupāda wrote back that he was so glad you have realized (the bliss of Kṛṣṇa consciousness). In a letter Prabhupāda said that when he first met Girirāja he was impressed with him and he prayed to Kṛṣṇa that this person (could develop into a wonderful devotee).
Prabhupāda told Girirāja that Kṛṣṇa is the origin of everything.
In Surat Girirāja asked Prabhupāda, “How can we deal with envy?” Girirāja said that he had thought about this question to himself considerably. But he thought that he was still a victim of envy of others. Prabhupāda answered, “Can you think of someone you don’t like?” Prabhupāda then said, “One should try to see the good in others and not envy them.”
Girirāja told Prabhupāda that he used to make movies and could he still do that? Prabhupāda said others can do that. Then Girirāja said he also liked to cultivate big people. Prabhupāda was pleased with that answer.
Girirāja asked, “When you are not here,” (how will things go on in ISKCON). Prabhupāda replied that there are so many leaders in ISKCON (and that things could go on even when he wasn’t there, if the devotees cooperated). When the devotees first arrived in India, they began going out chanting in public harināma, just as they had done in America. Prabhupāda told them to stop harināma because in India there were so many people singing in public and they were just begging for money. So, if we did harināma in public in India we would be seen as beggars. Then Prabhupāda revealed his plan for making Life Members. For 1,111 rupees one could become a Life Member. He would receive a lifetime subscription of Back to Godhead magazines, and all of Prabhupāda’s books. He would also receive accommodations at any of the ISKCON centers when he visited them. Tamāla Kṛṣṇa Gosvāmī objected and said that the benefits the Life Members would get will amount to much more than 1,111 rupees. Prabhupāda said no, the Life Members, after giving their initial membership fee, will be appreciative of ISKCON and will later donate more and more and become active in the movement. He said the devotees should “actually cultivate the people who were Life Members.”
Girirāja Mahārāja said that one quality of Prabhupāda that stood out for him was Prabhupāda’s compassion.
Girirāja mentioned his time in Boston. He said they didn’t make many devotees there, but one person named Peter came and joined. He was very eccentric. He used to sit in the front hallway with his legs stretched out and sometimes he would lay down completely and sleep. The devotees were embarrassed about his behavior, sleeping on the floor right near the front door. They began to call him “Crazy Peter”. The Boston devotees were very disturbed with the behavior of Crazy Peter. Satsvarūpa wrote to Prabhupāda and told him about the disturbance caused by Peter and whether they should not allow him to stay in the temple. Prabhupāda wrote back and said they should tolerate Crazy Peter. Later he left the Boston temple and moved to New Vṛndāvana and Girirāja lost touch with him. Twenty years later he happened to be in New Vṛndāvana and he asked the devotees about Peter, how was he doing. The devotees said that Peter was doing very well and then Girirāja saw Peter attending the maṅgala-ārati. This was in 1990. He found out that Peter’s new name since initiation was Kuśakratha. Girirāja was amazed. Kuśakratha was now famous for all his translations of Sanskrit and Bengali scriptures. He thought how wonderful Prabhupāda was.
pp. 60-68
Am I on time? Cars. The sun goes
low, fast, even by three it’s heading down
to the horizon. I don’t worry that
I can’t write erudite poems, and
don’t worry much that I don’t love God.
I depend more on my good
fortune and my father’s mercy.
What I’ve done, what’s left to do—
to walk in mud. My heels have
worn out, but they’ll get me new boots
if I ask, and a Maine Game Warden’s
parka for the cold and wet.
So don’t worry, Alfred E. Neuman.
My body aches but
I complain so much you’d think the pain was
always severe. The up-dangling
branches of winter trees from this window .. .
Just give me Krsna conscious tea, biscuit I say,
any words . . . I don’t eat after lunch—
any words to tap the unconscious.
Be mindful of Krsna,
He says, and bow to Him, be His devotee. I
do in some preliminary way. But the
ocean of my disqualification doesn’t seem
to bother me just now. I don’t know
why. It seems enough to do what I
can each day.
The sun goes down. I don’t make it happen
but I participate in it, and
in darkness climb into my bed,
after putting Radha-Govinda into Theirs.
Teachers of Zen and Christian prayer can’t
teach me much. They
don’t know that Krsna lifted Govardhana.
Because I know—
is that why I’m complacent?
What could a writer do that would
please the almighty God who has
everything? He who is all-attractive has
already garnered great Sanskrit writers
although He keeps hidden
from the masses. Maybe He’ll like it if I write out
my little life and share it with friends.
If I rid myself of doubts and
unnecessary self-hate, declare I am
the servant of the servant of the Lord and
really mean it. Krsna also doesn’t
need a writer who is some kind of
hypocrite or malicious person.
All right, man—ISKCON
is behind me, is in me this quay
land is ISKCON, Syama is ISKCON
and his wanting to leave the island and make a
dancing and drama career in Dublin and
my advice—”Keep early morning
reading and japa your bedrock.”
This is my ISKCON.
I’d like to tell about it.
But I’m afraid.
Not interested.
Wait and look.
From the shed I counted nine geese or hens,
nine rowboats, ten military helicopters, planned
forty volumes, assumed twenty years,
transmigration, one God, partridge in a
pear tree, quiet Christmas meal a
usual, don’t eat after lunch. I can’t
say what will happen next, but I
plan to write it down.
Green . . . water . . . island. Saturday
no one in sight. Did they go to a
bombed North Ireland town for harinama?
Expect me to go? I’ll say, “Oh, I’m lucky to go
from the shed to the house.” From the shed to the house.
He lectured in the morning. One girl in
the back moved excitedly to catch a better
look at his excited delivery of the
ancient wisdom—why we should live in
Vrndavana-dhama.
Then in the rowboat, they saw him off.
Ah, I ain’t got much in me
tonight.
Read a T.M. pamphlet on Ayurveda-
says we vatas ought to have cookies and
tea in the afternoon: “Think of the British
4 P.M. teatime.” But I don’t experience that
sharp decline usually. Besides, I couldn’t digest.
And no T.M., no sesame self-massage,
no vata scruples or I’d be watching
every moment—”Is it humid enough? Greasy enough?
Warm enough for me, a child of air?”
Spirit soul under the mask. Sees the world,
we each. I didn’t have to travel or even
walk to my shed this afternoon—it was
raining. The collie is wet and muddy
so I didn’t touch and he didn’t press in.
They keep a life preserver in the boat
just in case. Row me across,
it’s done, another Sunday.
In my lecture I joked. She said,
“I heard that one round at Radha-Damodara temple
is worth a hundred elsewhere.”
“Where did you hear that?” I asked. Then—
“One round at 26 Second Avenue
is worth two at Radha-Damodara.”
Viraha Bhavan Journal (2017–2018) was written by Satsvarūpa Mahārāja following a brief hiatus in writing activity, and was originally intended to be volume 1 in a series of published journals. However, following its completion and publication, Mahārāja again stopped writing books, subsequently focusing only on what became his current online journal, which began in August of 2018.
At first, I took it hard that I would have to live surrounded by the firemen, and without my own solitude. After all, for decades I had lived in my own house with my own books and my own friends. I was also now a crippled person who couldn’t walk, living among men who did active duties. But when Baladeva explained it to me, how it was not so bad living continually with other firemen and living in the firehouse with its limited facilities, I came to partially accept it and to accept the other men. I came to accept my new situation. I would live continually in the firehouse and mostly not go outside. I would not lead such a solitary life but associate with the other firemen.
Let me write sweet prose.
Let me write not for my own benefit
but for the pleasure of Their Lordships.
Let me please Kṛṣṇa,
that’s my only wish.
May Kṛṣṇa be pleased with me,
that’s my only hope and desire.
May Kṛṣṇa give me His blessings:
Kṛṣṇa Kṛṣṇa Kṛṣṇa Kṛṣṇa Kṛṣṇa he
Rāma Rāghava Rāma Rāghava
Rāma Rāghava rakṣa mām.
You mentioned that your pathway has become filled with stumbling blocks, but there are no stumbling blocks. I can kick out all those stumbling blocks immediately, provided you accept my guidance. With one stroke of my kick, I can kick out all stumbling blocks. —Letter by Śrīla Prabhupāda, December 9, 1972.
The Writing Sessions are my heart and soul. I’m trying my best to keep up with them. I am working with a few devotees, and they are far ahead of me. I wander in the wilderness of old age. I make my Writing Sessions as best I can. Every day I try to come up with a new subject. Today I am thinking of my parents. But I don’t think of them deeply. They are long gone from my life. Śrīla Prabhupāda wrote a poem when he was a sannyāsī, and he said now all my friends and relatives are gone. They are just a list of names now. I am like that too. I am a sannyāsī with a few friends. I love the books of Śrīla Prabhupāda. I try to keep up with them. I read as much as I can and then listen to his bhajanas.
The metaphor is song. Explain it. Yes, particulars may not seem interesting or profound to readers who want structured books.
Wait a minute. Don’t pander to readers or concepts of Art. But Kṛṣṇa conscious criteria are important and must be followed. So, if your little splayed-out life-thoughts are all Kṛṣṇa conscious, then it’s no problem.
I am near the end of my days. But I do like the company of like-minded souls, especially those who are Kṛṣṇa conscious. Yes! I am prone to Kṛṣṇa consciousness. I have been a disciple of Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupāda for maybe almost sixty years. Sometimes I fail him. But I always bounce back and fall at his feet. It is a terrible thing that I sometimes do not have the highest love for him. It is a terrible thing. Actually, however, I never fall away from him. He always comes and catches me and brings me back to his loving arms.
This edition of Satsvarūpa dāsa Goswami’s 1996 timed book, Upstate: Room to Write, is published as part of a legacy project to restore Satsvarūpa Mahārāja’s writings to ‘in print’ status and make them globally available for current and future readers.
A factual record of the reform and change in ISKCON guru system of mid ’80s.
Readers will find, in the Appendix of this book, scans of a cover letter written by Satsvarūpa Mahārāja to the GN Press typist at the time, along with some of the original handwritten pages of June Bug. Together, these help to illustrate the process used by Mahārāja when writing his books during this period. These were timed books, in the sense that a distinct time period was allotted for the writing, during SDG’s travels as a visiting sannyāsī
Don’t take my pieces away from me. I need them dearly. My pieces are my prayers to Kṛṣṇa. He wants me to have them, this is my way to love Him. Never take my pieces away.
Many planks and sticks, unable to stay together, are carried away by the force of a river’s waves. Similarly, although we are intimately related with friends and family members, we are unable to stay together because of our varied past deeds and the waves of time.
To Śrīla Prabhupāda, who encouraged his devotees (including me) To write articles and books about Kṛṣṇa Consciousness.
I wrote him personally and asked if it was alright for his disciples to write books, Since he, our spiritual master, was already doing that. He wrote back and said that it was certainly alright For us to produce books.
I have a personal story to tell. It is a about a time (January–July 1974) I spent as a personal servant and secretary of my spiritual master, His Divine Grace A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupäda, founder-äcärya of the International Society for Krishna Consciousness. Although I have written extensively about Çréla Prabhupäda, I’ve hesitated to give this account, for fear it would expose me as a poor disciple. But now I’m going ahead, confident that the truth will purify both my readers and myself.
First published by The Gītā-nāgarī Press/GN Press in serialized form in the magazine Among Friends between 1996 and 2001, Best Use of a Bad Bargain is collected here for the first time in this new edition. This volume also contains essays written by Satsvarūpa dāsa Goswami for the occasional periodical, Hope This Meets You in Good Health, between 1994 and 2002, published by the ISKCON Health and Welfare Ministry.
This book has two purposes: to arouse our transcendental feelings of separation from a great personality, Śrīla Prabhupāda, and to encourage all sincere seekers of the Absolute Truth to go forward like an army under the banner of His Divine Grace A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupāda and the Kṛṣṇa consciousness movement.
A single volume collection of the Nimai novels.
Śrīla Prabhupāda was in the disciplic succession from the Brahmā-Mādhva-Gauḍīya sampradāya, the Vaiṣṇavas who advocate pure devotion to God and who understand Kṛṣṇa as the Supreme Personality of Godhead. He always described himself as simply a messenger who carried the paramparā teachings of his spiritual master and Lord Kṛṣṇa.
Dear Srila Prabhupada,
Please accept this or it’s worse than useless.
You have given me spiritual life
and so my time is yours.
You want me to be happy in Krishna consciousness
You want me to spread Krishna consciousness,
This collection of Satsvarūpa dāsa Goswami’s writings is comprised of essays that were originally published in Back to Godhead magazine between 1966 and 1978, and compiled in 1979 by Gita Nagari Press as the volume A Handbook for Kṛṣṇa Consciousness.
This second volume of Satsvarūpa dāsa Goswami’s Back to Godhead essays encompasses the last 11 years of his 20-year tenure as Editor-in-Chief of Back to Godhead magazine. The essays in this book consist mostly of SDG’s ‘Notes from the Editor’ column, which was typically featured towards the end of each issue starting in 1978 and running until Mahārāja retired from his duties as editor in 1989.
This collection of Satsvarupa dasa Goswami’s writings is comprised of essays that were originally published in Back to Godhead magazine between 1991 and 2002, picking up where Volume 2 leaves off. The volume is supplemented by essays about devotional service from issues of Satsvarupa dasa Goswami’s magazine, Among Friends, published in the 1990s.
“This is a different kind of book, written in my old age, observing Kṛṣṇa consciousness and assessing myself. I believe it fits under the category of ‘Literature in pursuance of the Vedic version.’ It is autobiography, from a Western-raised man, who has been transformed into a devotee of Kṛṣṇa by Śrīla Prabhupāda.”
The Best I Could DoI want to study this evolution of my art, my writing. I want to see what changed from the book In Search of the Grand Metaphor to the next book, The Last Days of the Year.
a Hare Krishna ManIt’s world enlightenment day
And devotees are giving out books
By milk of kindness, read one page
And your life can become perfect.
Calling Out to Srila Prabhupada: Poems and PrayersO Prabhupāda, whose purports are wonderfully clear, having been gathered from what was taught by the previous ācāryas and made all new; O Prabhupāda, who is always sober to expose the material illusion and blissful in knowledge of Kṛṣṇa, may we carefully read your Bhaktivedanta purports.
I use free-writing in my devotional service as part of my sādhana. It is a way for me to enter those realms of myself where only honesty matters; free-writing enables me to reach deeper levels of realization by my repeated attempt to “tell the truth quickly.” Free-writing takes me past polished prose. It takes me past literary effect. It takes me past the need to present something and allows me to just get down and say it. From the viewpoint of a writer, this dropping of all pretense is desirable.
Geaglum Free WriteThis edition of Satsvarūpa dāsa Goswami’s 1996 timed book, Geaglum Free Write Diary, is published as part of a legacy project to restore Satsvarūpa Mahārāja’s writings to ‘in print’ status and make them globally available for current and future readers.