A very small DHL van drove right past the house without stopping. M. ran onto the road and waved to him. He came back and delivered our package. I told them not to send me letters during the japa retreat, so this package contains only a copy of Caitanya-bhagavata, some used tapes—plus a few letters. Even those few letters are enough to distract me. Now I can see the difference between the first row of distraction and the second row. By coming to the japa retreat, I have, after a week, mostly removed or reduced the first line of distraction. That is, the daily concerns of my work, my personal relationships, and so on. I have been chanting better even though I cannot get free of the second line of maya’s attack—the old memories. I appreciate now that this mail package has arrived how much the distractions have lessened.
Chanting with the distraction of my day-to-day life makes me want to get my rounds done. There is business to take care of and people to deal with. This is an offensive attitude toward the holy name; it prevents me from loving Krishna in His nama-rupa.
(_Begging for the Nectar of the Holy Name_)
JAPA POEM
I write of distractions to japa at the Japa Retreat.
My distractions have been reduced by asking
my secretary not to send
me letters. This
has enabled me to
chant better. Chanting
with business to take care of
and people to deal with creates
an offensive attitude in my japa.
“It prevents me from loving Krishna
in His nama-rupa.”