Baladeva’s alarm clock went off at 1:00 A.M.,
and our cowbells followed.
He administered my wake-up rituals,
including pre-emptive strikes
against headaches.
Baladeva brought me into the room
where the Deities are. I
bowed down and began japa.
For cultivation of thoughtfulness
I focused on “just hear” –
chanting and hearing with
no other meditation.
Anyone who understands that the Name
is non-different from Krishna Himself
and who absorbs himself in
the transcendental sound vibration,
is achieving a rare stage in chanting japa.
I met my quota after four rounds
with minutes to spare.
So far I felt no pain in the eyes
and was grateful for that. I
continued chanting with focus
and attention, appreciative of
the extended reprieve from pain.
I completed the second set,
and felt strong going into the third.
On the last two sets, I emphasized
speed as a priority over quality and clarity.
Adhering to “just hear,” I held on
to the bead for the first sixteen words
before moving to the next bead.
It was not rushed, reckless chanting.
I heard the Names clearly.
We try to do our best to follow
our japa regimen without becoming
merely mechanical.
I met my overall quota of sixteen rounds
with minutes to spare.
I considered it a half-decent session
with no physical handicap.
Had I not sped up so much on the last two sets,
I could have rated it “decent.” Krishna will
have to make the judgement ultimately
whether it was pleasing or not.
At least I carried out the process
of doing a prescribed number of rounds
in obedience to the order
of the spiritual master,
a sacred vow.