His Holiness Satsvarupa dasa Goswami Maharaja
Vyasa-puja Birthday Celebration
Saturday, December 7, 2024What
Meeting of Disciples and friends of SDG
Where
The Veterans of Foreign Wars Hall
845 Hudson Avenue
Stuyvesant Falls, New York 12174There is plenty of parking near the Hall. The facility is just a few minutes’ walk from SDG’s home at 909 Albany Ave.
Schedule
- 10:00 –10:30 A.M.: Kirtana
- 10:30 – 11:15 A.M.: Presentation by Satsvarupa Maharaja
- 11:15 – 12:30 A.M.: Book Table
- 12:30 – 1:15 P.M.: Arati and kirtana
- 1:15 – 2:15 P.M.: Prasadam Feast
Contact
Baladeva Vidyabhusana at [email protected] or (518) 754-1108
Krsna dasi at [email protected] or (518) 822-7636
“This week was quite a ride for Satsvarupa Maharaja. The disorientation got worse from the time he fell, and then we decided to check for a UTI. The lab work turned out positive, so again he has to take another course of antibiotics. His feet began to swell again, so we went to a urologist this time for advice from that tradition. After an examination and suggesting an increase in the water pills, he said that the real problem is that Maharaja didn’t walk enough from sitting in a chair too much. So Satsvarupa Maharaja has promised to try to do more exercise. He also got a shot in his right sacroiliac joint because the one in the left side really reduced the pain.
After the falls there was some question about the caretaking procedures. We try our best. There is always someone on duty twenty-four hours a day carrying a walkie-talkie, and Satsvarupa Maharaja has one by his sitting places. Near the places he usually falls is an emergency button tied to alarms downstairs. But . . . he has to remember to use them, which isn’t always the case. Parkinsons is kicking in, and he is becoming a little more forgetful and disoriented. But the writing still goes on, and Satsvarupa Maharaja pointed out that his editor says that it’s very good.
ys,
Baladeva
I pray to keep attentive and to make my chanting more holy. It is sometimes difficult to meet Nama Prabhu at a deeper level. . . . I am thinking of Prabhupada’s translation of Siksastakam: “It increases the ocean of transcendental bliss, and it enables us to fully taste the nectar for which we are always anxious.” I’m not in the ocean of transcendental bliss, but I am anxious for the taste of the nectar. I am praying to Krsna for effort and steadiness. I am calling to Him in my desperation. Please, Lord, let me keep steady and improve. Don’t let me slip.
******
A routine day, struggling to stay with Nama Prabhu, begging my mind to stay alert and fixed. I stay at a decent level and do not submerge beneath the water of consciousness. But I wish I was better, fresher in the realm of the Hare Krsna mantra.
******
Krsna-varnam tvisa-krsnam. This verse from Srimad-Bhagavatam (11.5.32) tells how He is worshiped in Kali yuga. The Lord is worshiped differently in different yugas. In Satya-yuga He was worshiped by meditation. In Dvapara-yuga He was worshiped by sacrifice, and in Treta-yuga He was worshiped by Deity worship. In Kali-yuga He is worshiped by chanting. In the Srimad-Bhagavatam, when Maharaja Pariksit heard the predictions of how the people would suffer in Kali yuga, he became sad. To encourage him, Sukadeva Gosvami told him that in this bad age, there is one boon. Although the age is full of miseries, the first-class boon is that in the midst of catastrophes, one can be free of all contamination by chanting Hare Krsna.
******
There are different Puranas for people in different mentalities. The Bible was written for a different age, when people were not so advanced. But they should be given a chance. Rajasic Puranas are for demigod worship to have material desires fulfilled. But the Bhagavatam says that if you have material desires, you should still go to Krsna. Krsna has arranged demigod worship because there is freedom of choice. In all Vedic literature, the last goal is Krsna. In Kali-yuga we are so condemned, but even the demigods praise this age because simply by sankirtana all interests are served, both material and spiritual. Therefore the Hare Krsna mantra is called the maha-mantra.
******
“As to the processes starting with hearing and chanting of the Names, which are the ingredients of vaidhi-bhakti, the wise should know them to be essential at the stage of spontaneous devotion as well.” (Srila Rupa Gosvami, Bhakti-rasamrta-sindhu, Eastern Wave, Chapter 2, Verse 296)
******
Srila Visvanatha Cakravarti Thakura points out in his comments to this verse that the processes starting from hearing and chanting of the holy names, the angas of vaidhi-bhakti, which are to be observed in the spontaneous stage, should also include the submission to the spiritual master or guru, because without such submissive guidance by the spiritual master there is no chance of following in the footsteps of the residents of Vrndavana.
******
You can’t speculate. You can do it for many years, but you’ll never understand. Guru means weighty. People think, “I know everything.” In the Vedic system, a child goes to gurukula and works as a menial servant of the guru. The guru can ask him to do any kind of duty, and he does it. Even Krsna went to gurukula. Caitanya Mahaprabhu accepted a guru. Prakasananda Sarasvati was criticizing Lord Caitanya as a sentimentalist for chanting. Prakasananda asked him, “Why don’t You study Vedanta?” Caitanya Mahaprabhu took the part of an ordinary person. He replied, “My guru found Me to be fool number one. He said, ‘You can’t read Vedanta-sutra.’ He advised Me to chant Hare Krsna, and I’m getting the result.” In the present age, people aren’t interested in Vedanta. They are very bad and slow. They are not interested to know that there is a life after death and that they may have to take an inconvenient position. Therefore, one should consider that Arjuna accepted Lord Krsna as his spiritual master. “You teach me, and I will take Your lesson.” It is meant for everyone.
******
You’re sorry when you start japa late because you fear you’ll neglect the mantras. There’s no need to neglect them, even if you start late. You still keep your pace, rapid but even, and clearly enunciating the words. So what if it takes you longer into the day to complete the rounds? You still have to do them all, and as nicely as possible. It’s the duty of the individual. You made your individual vow to Prabhupada to do sixteen rounds. It’s a solemn vow. Other things can be put aside in order to complete your japa. You hear yourself chanting and rumble along. You keep the same reverence. You restrain your impatience and irritation. It’s just another day. Chanting gets done, rain or shine. You spend a late morning chanting. It means just as much to you on an early day as on a late day. There’s not some great advantage on an early day. It just seems that way. A chanting career is built on steadiness day in, day out, and in attention to the mantras, no matter what the condition. You control yourself to keep the same quality and effort in hearing. There’s no racing to get a “bargain basement” set done. Holy, holy, holy, merciful and mighty. Be careful you don’t cheat yourself and do less.
******
When you are actually chanting, it’s not laborious. Sometimes thinking about chanting and how many rounds you have to chant gets laborious or worrisome. Procrastination or panic become negative factors. But actual chanting is smooth riding, and it’s actually fun and enjoyable. You just have to keep moving along and take the responsibility for the larger number of rounds still to do. As you chant, they always gradually diminish, and quickly, too. The absolute necessity of chanting should not be a burden but just a given factor. I actually like to chant and shouldn’t forget that. I just get bothered when I run into conflict with other things on my schedule and the quality of the chanting is disturbed. On days when you are behind in your schedule, you may have to sacrifice other activities, and you should do that willingly. Quality chanting always comes first.
******
Chanting behind, I
control my mind and
assure myself there is
nothing to fret.
You’ll reach the goal before
the day is out, so what’s to
worry? You have to do it so
you might as well enjoy the
easiest practice of the day.
Oh well, let’s admit it’s not always
so easy and you are not always so
willing but it’s do or die so rest
with that.
******
Yesterday I heard a lecture Prabhupada gave on November 13, 1968, in Los Angeles. It was a commentary on Narottama dasa Thakura’s song “Hari-hari-biphale.” In this song, Narottama dasa Thakura is lamenting, hari-hari-biphale: “I have uselessly spoiled my life.” The human form of life is an opportunity to find out why we’re wandering from one life to another. But instead of inquiring, we waste our lives in these material things. So Narottama dasa Thakura is lamenting: “My life was meant for understanding Radha and Krsna, but I spoiled my life.” What is the lamentation? Golokera prema-dhana, hari-nama sankirtana: “The chanting of Hare Krsna is coming from Goloka.” The vibration is coming from Krsna. Our heart is always burning, trying for sense gratification. Unless you come to the spiritual platform, you’ll never be satisfied. “I did not search out the immediate relief of hari-nama sankirtana.”
******
The chanting of the holy name resonates in your mind and comes out of your mouth. You pay attention to the quality, that each mantra is uttered clearly, each syllable pronounced and heard. You try as usual for reciprocation with the Divine Couple. Have faith that They are hearing you and are pleased with your recitation. This is the most important part of your day. “Of all the orders of the spiritual master, the order to chant sixteen rounds is essential.” (Caitanya-caritamrta, Madhya 22.113, purport) I am all right, don’t worry about me.
******
Say it over and
over again, the
maha-mantra.
Say it over and over
again, thousands of
times, from your
heart.
Let Krsna’s names vibrate
in your room as you finger
your beads. Let the early
hours go by and repeat the
mantras without cessation.
That’s the way to Krsna in this
age. It’s the best way to realize
that the Name is Him. By many
repetitions without offenses, you
will realize
success in spiritual life.
Say it over and over
again: Hare Krsna Hare
Krsna Krsna Krsna Hare
Hare Hare Rama Hare
Rama Rama Rama
Hare Hare. Say it until you’re
tired, and then say more.
You’ll get your second wind and start to relish the sound vibration as coming from Goloka. Keep chanting later in the day and try to extend your numerical strength until you’re a lover of the holy names.
******
Japa requires our full attention. We can’t let the mind wander into ethereal space. It has to be nailed down. First of all, keep up a lively pace and listen to the syllables of the mantra and remember whose names you are chanting. Chanting is a rigorous practice. When you’re going smoothly, it doesn’t seem to require so much labor. The rounds go quickly, and you elevate yourself to better chanting. But when you run into trouble, then you slow down, and the mind wanders. You have to get a grip on yourself and keep the pace. Otherwise, you get lost. When the mind goes vague, chanting veers off into non-intense japa. You need a wake-up call to return to the track. Otherwise, you fall behind and get disappointed.
******
Chanting in a lost way is a sorry
state of affairs. You lose your strict
consciousness for what you’re
supposed to do.
The only remedy is to wake up
to your purpose and put your foot
on the accelerator, your heart
turned back to Krsna.
It’s an easy process, and time
lost can be regained by a change
in attitude and making up for lost
time. Ask Krsna for forgiveness
and show Him your better side.
Don’t slide.
pp. 204-6
I want Lord Krsna is sometimes shy to show His love for the gopis if Balarama or His parents are present. We like to see Krsna in this mood. We adore His belligerent boasting when He is about to fight a demon and we equally adore His exhibition of shyness.
Protector of surrendered souls: even a demon can surrender to Krsna and the Lord will protect him, as He did when Ravana’s brother Vibhisana switched over to Ramacandra’s side. One of the six symptoms of saranagati (surrender) is to see Krsna as your protector. The residents of Vrndavana usually see Krsna as their child or friend or lover, but in difficulty they seek His protection. When Indra sent floods to Vraja, all the devotees ran to Krsna and He protected them by lifting Govardhana Hill and holding it as an umbrella.
One time a forest fire raged through Vraja and the lives of the boys and cows were in danger. The boys cried out to Krsna, “We know You can protect us from this great danger . . . We are completely dependent on You . . . ” (KRSNA, Chap. 19, p. 134).
The Supreme Lord offers His protection to all souls: “Abandon all varieties of religion and just surrender unto Me. I shall deliver you from all sin-ful reactions. Do not fear” (Bg 18.65).
What is this method of self-purification? A brother said, “You expose yourself completely. It seems to work for you.” He said he wouldn’t want to try it himself, not through writing.
They mostly write to convey information given in the scriptures. When we write our “realizations,” it comes out as admitting wrongs. I write to catch myself in acts of foolishness and deviation. It serves that purpose and other purposes also. It is for me and for those who will kindly read it and be benefited. If they enjoy my attempt, that’s good enough for me. The writing then succeeds in pleasing the Vaisnavas.
He also asked, “If I write a book, it’s a huge endeavor. So I have to ask myself as a servant of God, whether it’s the best use of my time.” He said only a few hundred people may read a book and then it becomes an old book, and only a dozen or so are sold each year. For myself, I can’t calculate that way. I can offer other statistics in support of writing, such as the people who will read in the future. Anyway …
I didn’t really offer this brother any bright suggestions. Then I said, “I have entered early old age. It is the time when you feel you had better make your fullest contribution. You have to do whatever it is that you want to accomplish in this life, without worrying too much about what others think of it.”
But what is the importance of what I think? I may doubt myself, but I am not going to stop doing what I am doing. Each of us has to gain some resolution, some strength of purpose, to go full steam ahead! Here goes my Radharani Express over the thin-gauge railroad tracks of Vrndavana. The old locomotive drives the pistons, emits black smoke, lets out a long wail-whistle. And I allow sadhus a free pass to Mathura. Haribol.
I said I write but I don’t advocate it to others. He laughed and said, “Yes, or else there would be thousands of persons publishing books about their struggles in Krsna consciousness.” That might not be so bad either. As it is, we now have thousands of karmis who write of their struggles to enjoy the material nature.
This morning I am supposed to give the Srimad-Bhagavatam lecture. The topic is illicit sex. I have prepared some notes, but I don’t want to be too prepared. I have a little trust that ideas will come from my experience and faithfulness to Srila Prabhupada and his teachings. Don’t be afraid. You know you are not the Greatest Devotee and Lecturer, nor does your audience have that expectation. Deliver what you actually can and be humble about it.
Regarding old age, I realize I won’t be able to operate in top condition. I have to get down what I want to say before it’s too late.
pp. 37-40
Is this Stowie 8? I can’t keep track of them, there are so many piling into the back of the truck. Put a cat in a bag and call it a pig. When a buyer opens the bag, he cries, “The cat’s out of the bag!” So many people have traveled hidden. The Lord’s Deity form is often stowed, marched past the stupid border guards who fail to recognize Him.
Is stowing away the same as sneaking under fences? I once sneaked into a circus and another time a baseball game, both times under fences—once into a state fair. I sailed on a ship to Timbuktu. We wore our wigs to Trinidad, and we were paying customers, sneaking in as if we were tourists, this sannyasi and his brahmacari assistant. Oh, Krsna.
Deep, deep. You need to find yourself alone on a mystical journey. Why were you born? What is your purpose in this incarnation? Don’t flow with false motives. Don’t become distracted. Did you want a spiritual path so that you could become a guru and be worshiped? Did Lefkowitz catch me on that one? Be a good boy, and the guru will make you the next guru? I am enduring. I am confused. I don’t remember what I have so much forgotten—what I really want¬ed to do. Deep in my heart, did I ever want to purely serve Krsna through Prabhupada? I can’t recall. I do recall wanting to escape the Lower East Side’s madness. I do recall being attracted to the mystical East, whatever it was (I didn’t know). Couldn’t make it in carnal life. Scared out of it by my mother and St. Augustine.
You can always find happiness
in the roll of rhythm.
Don’t be afraid to dance in a way
that eases the furrows from your brow.
But travel straight ahead.
We played together in the Strand Theater when
I was ten and watching
movies start on time. Sometimes
I was alone in the audience with
Zachary Scott, cowboy. Watched
him kiss the horse’s face. Realized
I didn’t like people who liked pizza.
Later learned that God
is the best person.
I know He’s almighty.
We’re all making adjustments—
Bala too—taking me less as a person
and more as a guru—no, I mean
to say, less as a guru …
You see, I’m confused I
walk alone but can’t think.
They assure me I can
go to Mayapur or
Tipperary.
She said when I started free-writing she
had to adjust
lives still on a tightrope.
I love you, she said, but don’t know what you are.
I’m just a fire hydrant kid with a soft heart
and not much fight left.
Happy stowies in an unhappy world. They are trying to get out. “I’ll hang onto your dhoti and you’ll bring me to Prabhupada.” Thanks for that faith.
People doubt whether I’m a “sastric” guru or merely human. They like me either way, but prefer I be bona fide and take them back to Godhead.
Deeper. O mystical journey. Am I cheating? Is the real me not good enough? No, I have to be divine, pure enough to hear Prabhupada talking. I have to ride on the wings of Garuda and the chariot to Vaikuntha, but deserved.
Can’t ride in a pickup truck. I let people pass me on the road. They are Prabhupada’s disciples, and I really think they deserve a round of applause.
But I’ll have to go deeper into darkness. 0 dark night of the soul, you force me to endure confusion so I can come to clarity. Let me accept what God wants from me.
But I don’t know what it is. It’s Sunday and
he’s waiting for a lawyer—
on a Sunday.
After payday, a Sunday with her
but why not one day with God?
Every day! Complaining preacher
says people should pray
either way it’s long
or never
but after payday
Krsna, I’m with you
while chanting. I’m
full of rounds and rounds. Am I in hell?
I have to improve!
But I tell myself I need
rest to
wrap my troubles
in a dream.
“You are still my favorite author.”
“You are my favorite tenant,” said eight-year-old Louise Campesi on her parents’ behalf. But you are not my favorite bug-eyes. I want plenty of people around; meaning no one in particular. I want beads and jackets and boots to go walking. He returned her wedding ring and called it his karma.
They thought I had stowed cocaine up my anus and made me and Maha K. strip down on our way into Santo Domingo. I tried to maintain my dignity. I was afraid they would remove our wigs, but the dopes didn’t even suspect them. They gave us a piece of paper with a sort of apology for the ordeal written on it.
Entering Ireland from the ferry from England they searched our van. The most interesting thing they found was my huge supply of E-A-R earplugs. They dissected a few to make sure they were clean. I tried to explain about the noise on the road.
Entering Poland, customs dismantled part of Madhu’s well-constructed van interior. Afterwards, they shook his hand, smiling, and complimented his carpentry.
Once when I was entering the USA from abroad carrying a beautiful new briefcase, the guy at customs took out a knife and slit the interior. “Hey! What are you doing?” I protested. He was indifferent. Handed me a piece of paper and said if I wanted to complain, go to the supervisor’s office. When he saw I was trembling, he said, “Don’t worry, we’re not the KGB.”
Once I had my sannyasa danda well wrapped in plastic to protect it in transit. When I tried to enter Puerto Rico, they insisted I unwrap it. But the tape with which I had sealed it was so tough they couldn’t cut through it even with their knives. When I explained the religious nature of the danda they let me go. In Australia, however, they made me unwind all the cloth and poles, the bastards.
Stowies left, stowies right. Why don’t you stop reading those newspapers and emoting with the dolls of the universe? The elegant six-foot-two center of the UConn basketball team vaulted her team to the national championship and their thirty-ninth win in a row. That’s light stuff. Arafat boxed in, living in a few rooms, his death desired by many. The United States, Israel’s best ally, makes those people hate him.
Who are terrorists? My terrorists are your freedom fighters. They stow bombs around their waists, enter bus stations or cafés, and blow themselves up along with their nineteen enemies. Revenge or retaliation—who can say for sure?
If I didn’t read the newspapers, would this stuff stop happening? Would I be better off? Thoughts are our own “universe,” and we carry that world with us as we jam into subway cars and meditate on the way to work. One monk I know took a lowly job. Imagine that God wants us to work humbly. It’s our assignment. Listen to His voice within. He’s letting you deal with your difficult marriage. Be happy with whomever you meet.
Rats stow away on ships. There was a Punch cartoon that showed the pompous and blushing admiral boarding a ship where all the rats were running down the rope connecting the ship to the shore. They knew he was a loser. Even the rats didn’t want to stow away with him.
Story of a man who out of desperation stowed away on the S.S. Titanic just before it sailed. He did not survive.
You are my friend. In our cell
we sing songs to keep from going
crazy. Black and white
doesn’t matter after a few
years.
I got to know you
Irishman, and you
love me, Jamaican.
The man fought to get up
to his son. I told him,
“You’d better leave me alone.”
Don’t just stand there! Do something practical!
He threw water
on the floor and backed
out of the room.
These are Krsna vanities
and I remember all of them because
I was a Krsna conscious young man
headed for the top.
You had to be puffed up and
motivated to serve. Had to say,
“Don’t be stupid. Warm
up my milk!” Or,
“These pancakes stink.
Make them over.”
So don’t desert me now.
She asked me to wear my seatbelt,
remembering how the car rolled over
and over and never again will we see him.
He was buried within hours
under too many flowers
our Tamal—our
fiery and loving.
pp. 280-82
Wind, wind. It has been a very good place for quiet and no interruptions. The shepherd’s act is distant, no words or looks exchanged. We sit on the edge of the land facing the Atlantic and my room is heated. A good place. I didn’t accomplish some book as I’ve done in other places. But I’ve got this, twelve legal pads of sessions. And I’m ready for more.
Do not slight Ramananda Raya, thinking him to be a sudra, a man of the world, said Sarvabhauma to Lord Caitanya.
I look up and see M. in the far meadow. He’s looking for a gap or low point in the fencing where I can cross over when I go out tomorrow morning for my walk.
It seems strange that after such pure doses of krsna-prema I get in reading in parampara, I still go back to the State Fair or consider reading something nondevotional. Well, I don’t “go back” in a voluntary re-investment of time. It just comes upon me. I do defer, I say, “Thanks, but no thanks” to Merton’s desert wisdom, to Miller on Rimbaud, etc. I check such thing out as quickly as possible, like a soldier who defuses bombs. I look at it, and put it aside. Sometimes it takes several sessions of ten minutes or so before I’m rid of it. I’m not going back, rather I’m dealing with what I already am. I don’t hate it, don’t hate myself or my past—it all leads me to the present auspicious place.
I should regret, but I don’t. At least I’m not going to sentimentalize by re-investment of time. One exception is my requesting to hear A Love Supreme. Even that will probably be a matter of hearing some of it because I keep thinking about it, then letting it go. You can’t just cut off all these things. There’s an art to letting them go. Krsna will ultimately let you forget it all totally.
For now I dream—that I am supporting my father against criticism. I feel pro-Dad. How does it come? It just does. It’s my makeup. I’m a devotee with links to Srila Prabhupada, but I was something else; I was in illusion. That is what must be dealt with and dropped in the most effective way.
Mostly it’s a matter of pursuing the present Krsna conscious opportunities and by ruci, I won’t want to hear, see, touch, go to anything except the higher taste of Krsna consciousness. I won’t see Krsna consciousness as Indian and myself American; I won’t insist that I have a Western heritage and roots. I won’t see Lord Caitanya’s culture of music and art and religion as Bengali.
It’s true I’m always a bit Western—more so when this body is in the West, but in India also. Deal with it. Be a Hare Krsna devotee in the style of Prabhupada who knew (only he knew) how to allow people to be members of nations, not repressing it, but using it to help their nation come to Krsna consciousness. I’m an international Hare Krsna member, speaking and writing American English and all this can be used in his service.
But don’t cry for or with Judy Garland. Don’t re-invest. Be a sannyasi inner and outer as he should be. Even if you like to indulge in past culture, don’t do it. If you ever do “for research” or “relaxation” be careful. Don’t “O.D.” on poison. Better to be safe than sorry.
Soon I’ll be going to Italy. I can have pasta prasadam—pizza, spaghetti, the works. It’s all possible—but no sin. Keep the sense gratification down. Serve your lord and master.
And writing practice? You know better than I. Keep writing true to Krsna consciousness.
pp. 29-35
The dhama is in a woody section away from main roads. The cement-top geodesic temple is a pleasing sight. One thinks, “Here is another of Prabhupada’s centers, way out here in North Carolina.” A few men were sitting around a picnic table, and one of them got up to greet us as our caravan rumbled onto the property. I asked for Bir Krsoa Goswami, and they directed me to his cabin in the woods.
Unfortunately, as soon as we had pulled out of Raleigh, I began to get the old pains behind the right eye. But I couldn’t stop now, so I went with a devotee named Mrdanga dasa, who led me over to Maharaja’s cabin. As soon as we entered the wooded path it reminded me very much of Gita Nagari. I was impressed to think how Bir Krsna Maharaja spends most of his time in this peaceful setting. Halfway into the woods, we met him coming to greet us. The other devotees dropped away, and Bir Krsna Maharaja and I continued to go back to his cabin. It is a classic, simple log cabin with a little porch overlooking a thick blackberry patch.
Once inside, he began to speak of the project as “small time,” and “simple.” But I sincerely praised him, because I know he has done everything here in a pure way. He came here four years ago, without any support, but with the determination to build up gradually. He did not engage in any businesses, nor today does he allow any devotees to engage in businesses, except for householders living outside. Whatever he has built here has come from donations from Indians, or by whatever little money they get from straight book distribution. I told him many of our temples are suffering now for not following these principles. Whenever we borrow money and buy big buildings, then we have to send devotees out on sales.
Bir Krsna Maharaja said that he has an aversion to managing, even in this small project. He has written a book that he is just about to print. One of his disciples is a monk in the Catholic church, and the book will consist of dialogues on different subjects between him and the monk. Bir Krsna Maharaja then asked me whether I had taken darsana of their Deities, Radha Golokananda. He said he is feeling enlivened by personally taking part in the Deity worship. Naturally, all these things were impressive to hear.
Bir Krsna Maharaja is extending to me all the etiquette given to a Vedic guest. He asked if there was anything I needed, such as a chair to sit on during mangala-arati. And he asked me to give all the classes.
In the Srimad-Bhagavatam class this morning there was a statement about the Lord’s rasa, and I asked Bir Krsna Swami and Gopiparanadhana Prabhu to speak after my lecture. The verse is a prayer by Lord Brahma in which he states, “I offer my obeisances unto Him who by His pastimes enjoys creation, maintenance and dissolution of the cosmic manifestation.” The question I asked was how Krsna can be engaged in rasa enjoyment with the material world, since it involves so much suffering for the living entities?
Bir Krsna Maharaja stated that we should not think of the material world simply as punishment for the living entities. It is also an auspicious chance for them to become rectified through punishment and through the Lord’s mercy — and thus go back to Godhead.
This reminded me of the prayers by the Vedas personified at the beginning of creation. The Vedas personified say that of all the Lord’s qualities the most wonderful is His compassion, which He exhibits when He opens the creation again. If the Lord did not make creation, then how could the conditioned souls have a chance to go back to Godhead? They cannot be forced back to Godhead, but they have to be given a chance while in the course of their material enjoyment to change their will toward surrender to Krsna.
Gopiparanadhana Prabhu said that this controversy of whether the Lord enjoys the sufferings of the living entities created a schism in the Sri sampradaya in the thirteenth century. He said that in our sampradaya we understand that Krsna is always kind toward His parts and parcels. If they are suffering, it is part of a large plan of the Lord.
This reminded me of an incident in Prabhupada’s boyhood. Prabhupada described that once when he was being very independent and naughty, he would not allow his mother to bathe him. He began banging his head on the ground and blood came. At that moment a neighbor came by and accused Prabhupada’s mother of cruelty. But actually the mother was simply taking care of her naughty child. And even if the mother punishes the child, that is also a partial display of her “rasa“— loving, caring, and sometimes reprimanding the dependent child.
Similarly, we should see how Krsna is always transcendental, and always relating with good intentions towards the jivas.
pp. 117-20
Shack in rain, bark but happy.
A devotee-friend read Memory in the Service of Krsna and was surprised that I spoke about my childhood. He said he thought the “standard” was not to talk about our pre-Krsna conscious lives. I see his point, but the memories I allowed were fit into a preaching format.
It makes me think: Are we supposed to censor memories? Is it possible? Is that repression? And if so, what good will it accomplish? Of course, it is possible to indulge in it: “Hey, let’s listen to ‘Trane again. He’s spiritual, right?” But to at least note one’s memories, especially when they do come—and they do . . . the child walking in the woods . . . his father yelling at him . . . Ananta remembering his training as a boy in the British school system . . . How does it affect him now? We can leave our histories behind because we are spirit souls, but in an-other sense, we can use our pasts to heal the whole person—the child who still lives in you . . . the nail-biter . . . the guy who always gets angry (why?) . . . the lusty one who can never get enough . . . the overeater (or the undereater) . . . Bring them all with you as you surrender and transform. You don’t want to hear me indulging in my own maya and I don’t want to hear about your exploits as a football player. But I would like to hear how you are grateful to Prabhupada for saving you from all that. And sometimes, since we are friends, if you feel like telling me, I will hear how you felt when you were lonely or ridiculous before your awakening in Krsna consciousness. I won’t hold it against you.
“Forget the past,” says Bhaktivinoda Thakura. Forget the past cheaters, the past loves. I have gone on to better things in God consciousness, and I hope you have too. Past lives, please know I am on the path of liberation now. There is no turning back. If I meet a familiar face in a crowd, now growing older past recognition, and he steps forward to me and says, “Remember?” I won’t be afraid. Krsna can save all souls, including my old high school friends, my college teachers, my Navy friends, dogs I used to know, dogs I used to be . . . Krsna can save them all. So if I am giving a lecture on a houseboat in Hamburg, Germany, and someone comes up to me and says, “I knew you when, buddy,” I will smile (not without a tremor), and hang in there as Prabhupada’s man and say, “Well, this lecture is for you, too, and it is for me as you used to know me.”
In 1979, at the restaurant of the 55th Street Hare Krsna temple, Professor Thomas Hopkins said to me, “How do you feel now that you are supreme?” He meant now that you are one of The Only Eleven Gurus In The World. He smiled in a knowing way. I said, “I guess I am the same as I always was.”
He laughed. “I thought you would say that.”
Yes, I am the same person from Great Kills with the same inferiority complex. That carries over even into my life in the spiritual institution. I am the same rebel who felt crushed by my father’s heavy-handed control. Unfortunately, that sometimes carries over in an uncalled-for rebellious streak toward my spiritual father. The old self isn’t quite dead yet, but I know about him.
Yes, “forget the past,” don’t feed it anymore. Don’t associate with nondevotees except to preach. But don’t deny the past. Or are you a nitya-siddha? Was it only your “lila” to be so degraded you almost died of want and madness? Better to remember: Srila Prabhupada says, “Not only should one give up his past bad habits, but he must always regret his past sinful acts. This is the standard of pure devotion” (Bhag. 6.2.27).
Shack, speak to us. Rain allow us to tap into your memory, muses, give yourselves to divine utterances—all nature fall at the feet of Govinda.
Tiny self, adhere to His teachings. Give all you can, be a generous saint—do as your master did traveling and taking the time to tell people the truth—we’re gonna die soon, the life we’re leading will
throw us down to suffering,
so give it up and
serve the guru.
“Did you see the picture of the bulldozer excavating? Yes, it has to be followed up by other kinds of workers. It’s just a crude example. But as for you, critics, you better watch out. This is a hard-hat zone. Look out. I am a Prabhupada man and I’ve got work to do. We are preparing a new world for devotees to live in. They have hired me too. So don’t interfere. After me, the house builders will come. But we bulldozers have our own satisfaction, as we clear the rough land.
pp. 146-48
This is a place where all devotional desires can be fulfilled. We come here and pray to Vrnda-devi, and later to a deity of Mahadeva Siva. The deity of Vrnda-devi is a favorite of the devotees. I went there with a list of prepared prayers and then wrote new ones in a notebook. A Godbrother advised me not to make prayers only for myself but for others too, for the world. So I prayed for those I love and also for those devotees with whom I struggle. I can’t remember my list of petitions.
At other times when I heard someone was going to Kamyavana, I wrote prayers on pieces of paper, folded them up, and a friend placed them at Vrnda-devi’s feet. Going there physically gives us the credit to make the prayers.
Shall we all crowd around at once, or go up one at a time? It’s not like going to see Santa Claus in the department store basement. We would sit on Santa’s knee and ask for toys—all for ourselves. What is the nature of asking to have our desires fulfilled? Do we have faith that it will happen? What if we ask for something difficult to grant, like eternal service to Radha-Krsna? And what if our prayer-wishes are not our everyday desires? Our actual desires are to eat and sleep and get by without too much pain, but these are not devotional aspirations. When we go to see Vrnda-devi, we rise to the occasion and ask for the best things—our desires are based on thoughtfulness. Seeing Vrnda-devi is like an exercise in purifying our desires. If we desire something low-class, watch out!
Vrnda-devi arranges that the Vrndavana forests bloom for Radha and Krsna’s pastimes. She is the orchestrator of nature in this divine realm. She can grant our desires.
There is an old fairy tale of a woman who wished that her husband would have a nose like a sausage. Then she felt sorry she had wished that and wished that she could take back her wish. In this way, she wasted her two precious wishes. We may do like that, wishing ourselves into trouble, then wishing ourselves out of it: “Vrnda-devi, I take back what I said.”
When I saw Vrnda-devi at Kamyavana I prayed that one of my Godbrothers could find the balance he was seeking in his life between- his management duties and his desire for study and bhajana. I prayed for what I thought he wanted.
Can I pray for the world? Can I pray that the demons will accept Krsna consciousness? There is no harm. May I also be instrumental in serving Prabhupada and never be proud or want to hear that I am doing something wonderful. Pray that I can be free of anarthas and develop a taste in Krsna consciousness.
The Bible says, “Be still and know that I am God.” Srila Prabhupada, you quoted that as, “Be silent and know that you are God.” In that form, you criticized it as a nonsense prayer. A stone is silent, you said, but does that mean a stone is God? We will be active servants in Krsna consciousness, not like dead men. Hare Krsna!
At Kamyavana we should beg Vrnda-devi to purify our desires. We cannot become desireless, but we can become free of material desires. The Lord will glance at us and instill the spiritual desire to serve Him.
Near Kamyavana is Bimala-kunda, where Krsna used to play and splash with His cowherd friends. There were also later pastimes here, such as Draupadi asking Krsna to save her when Durvasa Muni and his sixty thousand disciples came for dinner.
“Even today, affectionate Lord Krsna enjoys the very sweet nectar of transcendental pastimes there, herding the cows with His brother and His many dear friends. A wonderful sweetness becomes manifest in the hearts of they who understand the nectar of this place. Of Vraja, which is more dear even than the city of Mathura, I take shelter.” (Vraja-vilasa-stava, by Raghunatha dasa Gosvami, verse 6).
pp. 146-47
na tatsiddhau loka-vyavaharo heyah kintu
phala-tyagas tat-sadhanam ca karyam eva
Even after one has achieved devotional service, one should not abandon one’s responsibilities in this world but should rather continue surrendering the results of one’s work to the Lord. And while still trying to reach the stage of pure devotion, one must certainly continue executing prescribed duties.
Lord Krsna has strongly criticized the pseudo-renunciants who live at the cost of society: “One who restrains the senses of action but whose mind dwells on sense objects certainly deludes himself and is called a pretender” (Bg. 3.7). Srila Prabhupada states that it is better to work in karma-yoga (Krsna consciousness) within one’s varna and asrama designation:
A householder can also reach this destination [Visnu, or Krsna] by regulated service in Krsna consciousness. For self-realization, one can live a controlled life, as prescribed in the sastras, and continue carrying out his business without attachment, and in that way make progress. A sincere person who follows this method is far better situated than the false pretender who adopts showbottle spiritualism to cheat the innocent public. A sincere sweeper in the street is far better than the charlatan meditator who meditates only for the sake of making a living. [Bg. 3.7, purport]
This does not mean, however, that ordinary work is itself the fulfillment of human life. The karmi slogan “Work is worship” is not the same as working in Krsna consciousness. But one has to do both: work to earn one’s living and at the same time work for the satisfaction of Visnu, or Krsna. Srila Prabhupada writes, “Any other work done in this material world will be a cause of bondage, for both good and evil work have their reactions, and any reaction binds the performer.”
How to maintain oneself and one’s family and at the same time work for Krsna is a great art, and as such it requires the guidance of the Lord’s devotee. If obligations to family and society conflict with one’s basic spiritual vows, then one must give first priority to the spiritual duties. One who has taken initiation into spiritual life should never give up his vow to chant a quota of holy names daily and to fulfill the basic orders of the spiritual master.
Whether a Vaisnava works in the business world or lives as a renunciant, he should never be embarrassed to preach Krsna consciousness or doubt the value of preaching. Even if we consider preaching work a debt to humanity, it is a crucial social commitment. Once the mother and father of a young devotee complained to Srila Prabhupada that their son was a full-time student in the Krsna consciousness movement. They said they wanted him to become a doctor. Prabhupada replied that they should let the young man decide for himself, and that in any case, there were many doctors in the world but few serious devotees. Prabhupada said that the work of the devotee was more important than the work of a physician. A doctor can repair the health of a few hundred people, but even that is temporary. Medical cures do not free the patient from his karma, which forces him to take rebirth and suffer again in another material body. But a devotee who successfully distributes Krsna consciousness can help people achieve liberation from birth and death. So his work is the most important in the world.
Although he may not be an expert politician or economist, a bhakta knows the real cause of people’s suffering—forgetfulness of their relationship with Krsna, which leads to their becoming conditioned by the modes of material nature. Knowing that bhakti-yoga is the only way to extricate oneself from material conditioning and reestablish one’s relationship with God, the devotee tries to distribute knowledge of Krsna consciousness. Srila Prabhupada writes, “Since the [devotee] tries to broadcast the importance of becoming Krsna conscious, he is the best philanthropist in the world” (Bg. 6.32, purport).
The preacher stays connected to the world, yet he is transcendental to worldly concerns. Although some yogis abandon society and cultivate their own spiritual salvation, the bhakti-yogi who follows Prahlada Maharaja, Lord Caitanya, and Srila Prabhupada keeps a compassionate connection with the people of the world. As Lord Caitanya stated to His followers, “Distribute this Krsna consciousness movement all over the world. Let people eat these fruits [of love of God] and ultimately become free from old age and death” (Cc. Adi 9.39).
The surrendered devotee, therefore, does not worry about his worldly situation, nor does he support mundane welfare causes. But to satisfy Lord Caitanya and the spiritual masters descending from Him in disciplic succession, he works magnanimously on behalf of all living beings by spreading Krsna consciousness.
To Śrīla Prabhupāda, who encouraged his devotees (including me) To write articles and books about Kṛṣṇa Consciousness.
I wrote him personally and asked if it was alright for his disciples to write books, Since he, our spiritual master, was already doing that. He wrote back and said that it was certainly alright For us to produce books.
I have a personal story to tell. It is a about a time (January–July 1974) I spent as a personal servant and secretary of my spiritual master, His Divine Grace A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupäda, founder-äcärya of the International Society for Krishna Consciousness. Although I have written extensively about Çréla Prabhupäda, I’ve hesitated to give this account, for fear it would expose me as a poor disciple. But now I’m going ahead, confident that the truth will purify both my readers and myself.
First published by The Gītā-nāgarī Press/GN Press in serialized form in the magazine Among Friends between 1996 and 2001, Best Use of a Bad Bargain is collected here for the first time in this new edition. This volume also contains essays written by Satsvarūpa dāsa Goswami for the occasional periodical, Hope This Meets You in Good Health, between 1994 and 2002, published by the ISKCON Health and Welfare Ministry.
This book has two purposes: to arouse our transcendental feelings of separation from a great personality, Śrīla Prabhupāda, and to encourage all sincere seekers of the Absolute Truth to go forward like an army under the banner of His Divine Grace A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupāda and the Kṛṣṇa consciousness movement.
A single volume collection of the Nimai novels.
Śrīla Prabhupāda was in the disciplic succession from the Brahmā-Mādhva-Gauḍīya sampradāya, the Vaiṣṇavas who advocate pure devotion to God and who understand Kṛṣṇa as the Supreme Personality of Godhead. He always described himself as simply a messenger who carried the paramparā teachings of his spiritual master and Lord Kṛṣṇa.
Dear Srila Prabhupada,
Please accept this or it’s worse than useless.
You have given me spiritual life
and so my time is yours.
You want me to be happy in Krishna consciousness
You want me to spread Krishna consciousness,
This collection of Satsvarūpa dāsa Goswami’s writings is comprised of essays that were originally published in Back to Godhead magazine between 1966 and 1978, and compiled in 1979 by Gita Nagari Press as the volume A Handbook for Kṛṣṇa Consciousness.
This second volume of Satsvarūpa dāsa Goswami’s Back to Godhead essays encompasses the last 11 years of his 20-year tenure as Editor-in-Chief of Back to Godhead magazine. The essays in this book consist mostly of SDG’s ‘Notes from the Editor’ column, which was typically featured towards the end of each issue starting in 1978 and running until Mahārāja retired from his duties as editor in 1989.
This collection of Satsvarupa dasa Goswami’s writings is comprised of essays that were originally published in Back to Godhead magazine between 1991 and 2002, picking up where Volume 2 leaves off. The volume is supplemented by essays about devotional service from issues of Satsvarupa dasa Goswami’s magazine, Among Friends, published in the 1990s.
“This is a different kind of book, written in my old age, observing Kṛṣṇa consciousness and assessing myself. I believe it fits under the category of ‘Literature in pursuance of the Vedic version.’ It is autobiography, from a Western-raised man, who has been transformed into a devotee of Kṛṣṇa by Śrīla Prabhupāda.”
The Best I Could DoI want to study this evolution of my art, my writing. I want to see what changed from the book In Search of the Grand Metaphor to the next book, The Last Days of the Year.
a Hare Krishna ManIt’s world enlightenment day
And devotees are giving out books
By milk of kindness, read one page
And your life can become perfect.
Calling Out to Srila Prabhupada: Poems and PrayersO Prabhupāda, whose purports are wonderfully clear, having been gathered from what was taught by the previous ācāryas and made all new; O Prabhupāda, who is always sober to expose the material illusion and blissful in knowledge of Kṛṣṇa, may we carefully read your Bhaktivedanta purports.
I use free-writing in my devotional service as part of my sādhana. It is a way for me to enter those realms of myself where only honesty matters; free-writing enables me to reach deeper levels of realization by my repeated attempt to “tell the truth quickly.” Free-writing takes me past polished prose. It takes me past literary effect. It takes me past the need to present something and allows me to just get down and say it. From the viewpoint of a writer, this dropping of all pretense is desirable.
Geaglum Free WriteThis edition of Satsvarūpa dāsa Goswami’s 1996 timed book, Geaglum Free Write Diary, is published as part of a legacy project to restore Satsvarūpa Mahārāja’s writings to ‘in print’ status and make them globally available for current and future readers.