“Satsvarupa Maharaja has been in a slide down for six days, so we took him to his PCP (Primary Care Physician). He has been super-fatigued—loss of some of his mobility, can’t sit straight at the table, and has to be held up to eat, extra-disoriented, very little writing, etc. The doctor ordered a blood test, which came back negative. He also ordered a urine culture, the results of which will come back on Monday. He started a UTI of antibiotics based on the symptoms anyway. Satsvarupa Maharaja’s feet and legs continue to swell, so we have to buy a new pair of shoes. The doctor gave us a referral to a vascular surgeon because of suspected circulation problems, and that appointment is on January 6th.
On another level, things aren’t bad. I would like to share his last unabridged writing entry from December 16th:
I am writing this letter from my state of Parkinson’s disease. It is nothing to be ashamed of. It is a disease where I have regular forgetfulness. In other words, I am always forgetting things as part of a chronic disease. This disease brings quite a few other effects, such as not being able to walk and other maladies. I am writing about this in this little vignette. It also brings me frequent headaches. But it does not bring me unhappiness. I live in the Krsna consciousness movement in a very happy state, surrounded by devotees of Krsna who bring me happiness by their association.
This condition leaves me with abilities to write and read and make poetry. Those are great assets that I still have in spite of the handicaps.
The great advantage to my life is that I am regularly able to think of Krsna and Radha, who are the Supreme Personalities of Godhead. Thus I live with great advantages. You could even say that I live in happiness, the bliss of Krsna consciousness, which makes all things copacetic.
I have written this little vignette to balance any misgivings one may have.
Thank you very much. Hare Krsna,
Baladeva
If you would like to help, please contact Kṛṣṇa-bhajana dāsa at [email protected] or [email protected] and we will find you a service that utilizes your talents.
Russia, Moscow
Dear Guru Maharaj!
Your Divine Grace Satsvarupa dasa Goswami!
Please accept our humble obeisances
All glories to Srila Prabhupada!
All glories to You!
My husband Arjuna dasa and I wholeheartedly congratulate You on the wonderful day of Your Vyasa-puja!
For Your pleasure, we inform You of the results of your book distribution in Russia in 2024:
“Prabhupada” – 16 380
“Prabhupada-lilamrita”, volume 1 – 441
“Prabhupada-lilamrita”, volume 2 – 313
“Prabhupada-lilamrita”, volume 3 – 493
“Essays on Vedic Literature” – 1025
“Narada Bhakti Sutra” – 1296
These books were distributed by sankirtana devotees all over the country.
Also, the Philosophical Book publishing house distributed the following number of Your books:
“Prabhupada Appreciation” – 42
“Prabhupada Meditations”, volumes 1-4 – 30
“Japa Reform and Reading Reform” – 38
“Srila Prabhupada Samadhi Diary” – 13
“With Shrila Prabhupada in the Early Days”, volumes 1-3 – 42
“From Imperfection Purity will Come About” – 9
“Japa Transformations” – 19
“Entering the Life of Prayer” – 37
“Obstacles on the Path of Devotional Service” – 22
“Truthfulness, the Last Leg of Religion” – 31
“Sri Chaitanya daya” – 14
“My Dear Lord Krishna”, volume 2 – 2
“Japa Walks, Japa Talks” – 4
“Nimai das and the Mouse, Nimai’s Detour, Gurudeva and Nimai” – 28
“Chota’s Way”, book 4” – 25
“Am I a Demon or a Vaisnava” – 11
“Guru Reform” – 9
“ISKCON in the 70s” – 18
“Vishnu-rata Vijaya” – 9
“Ishta-gosthi” – 14
“Distribute Books! Distribute Books! Distribute Books!” – 30
Total – 20 385 books distributed in Russia in 2024
Thus, dear Guru Maharaj, Your books continue to be distributed in Russia in the widest possible way (despite the fact that Your servant Ishana devi dasi has now grown old).
Another good news is that the publishing house “Philosophical Book” has printed Your book “From Copper to the Philosopher’s Stone” in Russia.
We will send this book to You by mail, dear Guru Maharaj.
The translator Nitya-tushti-devi dasi and I were engaged in the translation and editing of this book.
My husband Arjuna served You by transporting Your books to the Philosophical Book publishing house
Please, dear Guru Maharaj, bestow Your blessings on all the devotees who in one way or another participated in distributing Your books in Russia
___________________
The Gurvashtaka prayer, glorifying the spiritual master, is sung by devotees in temples in the morning during mangala arati:
samsara-davanala-lidha-loka
tranaya karunya-ghanaghanatvam…
“Just as a cloud pouring rain extinguishes a forest fire, the spiritual master extinguishes the blazing fire of material existence…”
Dear Guru Maharaj, I am now thinking that in our practice of Krishna consciousness, our youth and mature years are more happy. And when a person becomes old, the “blazing fire of material existence” intensifies for him, because the Fire of Time begins to devour his material body, causing great suffering.
Lately, dear Guru Maharaj, I have been thinking – can a spiritual master extinguish the fire of bodily suffering of an old person?
And I have come to the conclusion that to a large extent – yes
How?
Thanks to the blessings – to deepen the relationship with Lord Krishna!
Krishna consciousness is a living, dynamic process
And recently, dear Guru Maharaj, I have changed my attitudes and views on the world around me.
I am cultivating in myself the perception that this whole world is Love.
This is true, because there is only Krishna and nothing else.
The basis of this material world is Love, because the basis of this world is Sri Maha Vishnu.
In this world, everything consists of love, because Krishna is present in every atom.
Everything is love!
And even death is Krishna, as He Himself says in the Bhagavad-gita.
The whole world is Krishna! The universal Form of God!
And everything is love, because God is Love!
Dear Guru Maharaj, with this consciousness – perceiving everything as love – it will be easier for me to pass through the trials of old age
Please, dear Guru Maharaj, elevate me to this level of consciousness – to see Krishna everywhere and in everything!
Please, dear Guru Maharaj, grant me Your blessing for this – to always feel the presence of Krishna through the feeling of love!
yasya prasadad bhagavat-prasado
yasyaprasadan na gatih kutopi…
“The blessings of Krishna can be achieved only by the mercy of the spiritual master. Without his mercy, any attempt to achieve perfection is doomed to failure. Therefore, I must always remember my spiritual master and glorify him…”
Dear Guru Maharaj, My husband Arjuna and I wish You with all our hearts all the mercy of Srimati Radharani and Lord Krishna!
With grateful hearts at Your lotus feet
always Your servants Ishana devi dasi and Arjuna das
Russia, Moscow.
Chanting is very simple, but one must practice it seriously. Therefore, the author of Caitanya-caritamrta, Krsnadasa Kaviraja Gosvami, advises everyone to keep this verse always strung about his neck.
—Cc., Adi 17.32, purport
******
I pray to the dry leaves and trees. I mean to say, I pray to God, in the presence of the leaves and trees, “Please let us all mentally, verbally, worship hari-nama. Make it a trend for me, an interest—not a fad—but let me understand that it is the gateway to the attainment of pure devotional service. Improving my chanting is one of the most crucial ways to serve Srila Prabhupada, who says that of all the rules and regulations, chanting sixteen rounds is essential. Prabhupada did not mean mechanical rounds. He meant that we should chant with priti, with love.”
******
Situations of dire distress drive us to feel helpless, but we don’t realize that we are always in distress. We are so unaware. Here I am in a warm house in the middle of winter in the powerful U.S.A. It is quiet here and I have protective hosts. I have a measure of spiritual favor from guru and Krsna, and I accept the honor disciples and others offer me. Yet I don’t know that my life is slipping away and I still don’t fully love Krsna. I feel no shame and little regret over this. Is this not a helpless situation?
******
As for making factual advancement in chanting, I am helpless. I tend to think that my yearning is a yearning just for the cherry on top of the cake, but that I already possess the cake. I am like the materially puffed-up man who occasionally utters Hare Krsna.
******
I need the holy name. I want to reach out to save myself. I am stuck in a network of material amenities. I am stuck in the role of guru/preacher. I lack faith (or whatever) that the chanting of Hare Krsna can fulfill all my spiritual desires and will be the most pleasing service to guru and Krsna.
******
“A pure devotee knows that when he chants the transcendental name Krsna, Sri Krsna is present as transcendental sound. He therefore chants with full respect and veneration” (Cc., Adi 2.11, purport).
******
We each chant alone. We get good advice, philosophy, practical pointers from learned teachers, but then we must go and chant alone. The purports and verses often describe what a pure devotee knows, or what an obedient disciple should do, but where are we? We must ask ourselves. No one else can know. We have to do something about our state ourselves. The devotee (whom we aspire to be) knows that Krsna and His names are identical. But it’s a huge step in realization to practice the chanting with that understanding.
******
Perhaps I realize Krsna is His name; I know it to some little degree. Then how can I assume “feeling and veneration”? What else can I say but go on trying? The retreat, the japa worship, the daily best time saved for it, the listening to lectures on devotional science to keep me aware how the aparadhas will adversely affect me—all these are favorable. I am in the right place and in the right association. I am helping myself, and I am receiving divine assistance. So keep as humble as possible and hear the sound vibration of my own utterance of Krsna’s holy name.
******
Srila Prabhupada emphasized the chanting’s simplicity. But we have to persist. Keep at the attentive, concerned forefront. Don’t slip back from there. Know that chanting is very important in our life and always deserves our full attention. At least that much we should know. Then maybe the regret will come, and the gratitude for His mercy, and the attraction to His pastimes.
pp. 318-20
Sleeping on the floor, drifting away. O Lord, O energy of the Lord, please engage me in Your service.
I woke up and instantly forgot my dream. Something was there. Be yourself, a boy who has heard his teacher’s words and who repeats them.
Shack Notes means spending three weeks in a wholehearted attempt to live entirely occupied by writing. The writing is centered on repeated attempts to evoke Krsna consciousness. Each attempt must start from scratch. I accumulate markings, some direct hits, sometimes a feeling of going nowhere . . . but, gradually, I am gathering a growing conviction that writing itself is bhajana.
If you ask a devotee who spends his time chanting or singing bhajanas, “What do you get out of this? What tangible result does it produce?” He may reply (as Srila Prabhupada did) that “chanting produces chanting.” One sings to sing. He builds stamina to sing for longer periods of time. He improves. He stops measuring one session against another, one attempt to surmount his mind against another. He sings to sing, and he knows there is no other way but to sing. In this way, writing produces writing.
Tonight we heard of Krsna’s playing in Vrndavana in the summer season. It wasn’t uncomfortably hot there. The waterfall sent droplets of water into the air, cooling the bodies of Krsna and His devotees. The lotus pollen wafted in the breeze. Krsna blew His flute, and everyone was fixed in love of Krsna.
We spoke about Vrndavana and the apparent difference between the Vrndavana we find today and the Vrndavana described in the KRSNA book. I am trying to fix just a tiny particle of our talk, which is just an infinitesimal particle of Goloka Vrndavana, on Krsna, so that someone may read these lines and think of Him.
Praise Krsna according to the Vedic description of the Supreme Person. If it is actual praise, I do more than repeat the words of scripture. The dictionary gives us a definition: “To glorify [a god or saint].” I both praise God and offer my thankfulness. In this act, I hope to lose my false self, my sense of hunger, in the process of devotional service. I want to be engaged in a worthy pursuit.
Krsna, I heard how You came out of the water of the Yamuna wearing a beautiful garland and the golden ornaments given to You by the serpent Kaliya. The residents of Vrndavana were so happy to see You, it was like getting back their lives. Please accept my small appreciation. Help me to remove old associations so that I can see You clearly.
I speak of the Lord as He appears in my mind. But His presence seems faint there, so I turn to the Vaisnava acaryas. I must convince my mind to be submissive and receive Krsna consciousness in full force from the poetry and prayer of scripture. The mind can be the best friend in this endeavor, or it can be the worst enemy.
Writing can be a way to train the mind. One can write down slokas that absorb the mind. When the mind demands something more, one can either ignore it, or express the problem in writing and seek the solution—”My dear mind, why are you not a Vaisnava?”
One wants to rise early to write Vaisnava smrti. I recall Srila Prabhupada’s devotional labors in Srimad-Bhagavatam. We want to do something like that. His work is ideal, and like small children, we rise early and write as we saw our master do.
This is what he wrote one night in Hawaii, just after completing the Seventh Canto of Srimad-Bhagavatam and beginning the Eighth:
First of all, let me offer my humble, respectful obeisances unto the lotus feet of my spiritual master, His Divine Grace Sri Srimad Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati Gosvami Prabhupada . . . . He personally told me that publishing books is more important than constructing temples . . . . I am continuously trying to publish books, as suggested by my spiritual master. . . . On this occasion, therefore, I am praying to my spiritual master to give me strength to finish this work. I am neither a great scholar nor a great devotee . . .
No need to repeat my own lackings. I’ve got no Sanskrit, no power, not much of anything. But I have a desire to go to the gathering of Vaisnava sages and report something I have heard.
pp. 6-8
Dear Srila Prabhupada,
I want to make words just like I would as a kid when I was in the Catholic Confessional and confess. Or like a kid making prayers to God— you close your eyes often and put your hands together and say, “Dear God, dear Lord.” I pray to you like that, putting behind me the atheists’ scoffing.
Dear Srila Prabhupada, today we read this letter where you say that the sound is the guidance, that means the teachings that you’ve given us. They’re literally sound preserved in tapes, and we can call the printed book a kind of sound record. But vani means also living presence within the heart. I want to think that you can hear me and that I can do better and that prayer will help me concentrate. That it will build up by practice to something I can do more often, not only in a formal sense like now but at different times I can speak to you. I think praying to you like this will help me to gain faith that you are not an ordinary person. You’re not a person that somebody else can completely measure and package and tell me, “This is Prabhupada.” But you’re my spiritual master and I pray to you.
I can pray to you the way I do to Krsna and say, “Please protect me.” I can pray to you and say, “Please give me the strength to obey you.” I can come to you and confess, “Dear spiritual master, my own guru, you know my failings but I wish to recite them to you again. Some of them are that I’m not a bold preacher, that I don’t chant with attention, that I have doubts about the philosophy still after so many years. That I have various silly material attachments—those of the tongue for eating and by listening sometimes to music that’s not directly kirtana. . . I have a tendency to find fault and not to rejoice in the association of your other disciples. And many more shortcomings are mine as you know. So I ask forgiveness, but what is the sense of asking forgiveness or confessing if I cannot stop them? Therefore I go beyond confession to say, “Prabhupada, please accept me despite these faults, and at the same time know that I don’t wish to have them and I’d rather be rid of them and you’re almighty, you can give me it.”
Now it may be not right to say that the spiritual master is almighty. Then let me say saksad-dharitvena samasta-sastrair, you know the Almighty; Krsna is your friend. Acaryam mam vijaniyan navamanyeta karhicit. “Know the acarya to be as good as Myself.” (Bhag. 11.17.27) Bhaktivinoda Thakura prays to Gopinatha in his song: “You’re the most intelligent person, find a way to get me out of my fallen lusty position.” With your permission I can pray to Krsna directly too as I do every day when I chant Hare Krsna Hare Krsna Krsna Krsna Hare Hare/ Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare. That’s a direct call to Krsna and Krsna’s energy, Srimati Radharani. But I do it by your permission, and I’ve heard again and again that one has to go to Krsna through the guru. Yasya prasadad bhagavat prasada, you have to please the guru, not independently go to Krsna. So I’m praying to you like that. That is, that I pray to you knowing that a prayer to you is as good as a prayer to Krsna; tathapi janiye ami taohara prakasa, you are full manifestation (prakasa) of the Lord Himself. (Cc. Adi 1.44) May I learn to talk with you with trust and faith.
I call this Prabhupada Smaranam also a conversation. Conversation is two-way, so let me be silent and try to hear from you back by different feelings that may come from time to time.
Maybe that’s enough for my first Smaranam session. Thanking you for giving me the inspiration to do this, and I hope I’ll be able to keep it up in a meaningful way. Signing off now,
your servant eternally,
Satsvarupa dasa
pp. 111-113
There are different definitions given. I mean, “sage” is mentioned twice because the definitions are so completely different. The first “sage” is a kind of plant with reputed healing powers and culinary use. We’re not concerned with that definition. The second meaning comes from the Old French to Middle English, and of course, originally from the Latin, sapius, sapiens: “wise.”
I don’t know why I chose this word exactly. I guess I wanted to see whether our nonsectarian dictionary had at least some word for sadhu. Of course, there are many, although the definitions are brief. The dictionary certainly doesn’t tell us how such a man (or woman) attained his wisdom. We say a sadhu is one who knows Krsna and who knows the difference between matter and spirit.
Of course, in the Western context, a sage can mean one who possesses practically any kind of wisdom. They don’t restrict it to spiritual wisdom. If we used the word loosely, we could say that a sage may not be up to the ultimate standard of pure Vaisnavism, but he would at least know sankhya philosophy and yoga, or be an austere jnani. He at least would have to be very much aware of the temporal nature of life and not engage in sense gratification. If he knew that, he could understand the happiness and distress in people’s hearts. To be truly wise, however, he would have to know Krsna.
In this context, why not cross-reference it with “guru”? “Guru” is a buzzword in this country. We have baseball gurus, Wall Street gurus, gurus who advise presidents on how to run for office. Anybody who’s got savvy can be called a “guru.”
Hindi: venerable
origin: “heavy”
Yes, it’s used derisively, both because people pretend to be gurus or because they have such a democratic attitude that they have come to scorn anything and anyone. It’s too much that someone knows so much that people will go to him for advice. How can they tolerate it?
That’s the way of words, though. “Guru” is a sacred word, but even in ISKCON it’s used derisively or is at least challenged. What is a real guru anyway? The word is so helplessly embroiled in history and experience. It reminds me of those court cases that are battled out for generations without a decision. The sastra defines guru and the institution tries to apply it in their own context. Then the word becomes embroiled in the successes and failures of the institution.
Therefore, our Krsna conscious definitions have to be taken not from the dictionary or from experience, but from sastra. Sastra is the real dictionary. No mundane dictionary or experience can penetrate beyond the preliminary concept. That doesn’t eliminate the fact that we have to apply the sastric definition, but it does make the definition clear. This creates an interesting relationship between the absolute acceptance of sastra and our own intelligent application of it.
Prabhupada’s transliterations are dictionaries in themselves and a useful resource. Of course, each definition is specific to the usage in a particular verse, but that doesn’t minimize its value. We have a different relationship with Prabhupada’s transliterations than we do with the mundane dictionary definitions. We may be curious about the material dictionary. We may even use the definitions in essays or other forms of preaching because it has such influence over people. But we tend to be ambivalent toward its definitions at best.
Let’s go beyond that. Let’s rescue all these words, spiritualize them, and claim them for Krsna’s service. Ironically, “guru” is a tough one because the dictionary definition just can’t go far enough. And it admits to derisive usage. In our definition, we can say that a guru is one who knows Krsna and that he is, by definition, a qualified disciple of a qualified guru, but as we take the word and apply it, we wind up embroiled in controversy. In other words, we face our own problems in trying to create a spiritualized dictionary because we haven’t agreed on all the nuances of the definitions.
pp. 57-63
When devotees ran for political office, they found themselves forced to use their intelligence to apply Krsna consciousness to the immediate problems of poverty, crime, taxes, and how to dispose of the city’s garbage. Politics is worldly and very complicated and requires a certain kind of creative problem-solving ability within a Krsna conscious context. As brahmaṇas, we can at least know what Prabhupāda actually said on these issues, as well as what the Vedic tradition and ideal is. We can also learn how Prabhupada adjusted some of these traditions to fit the needs of Kali-yuga nations.
Prabhupada said that it is the duty of the government (that is, the king) to kill all bad members of society, such as thieves, dacoits, murderers and animal killers. It is not enough simply to pass laws and expect the citizenry to obey. There must be an example set that will frighten lower class men into obeying the laws set down by the rulers. This would appear to be closer to the systems presently practiced in some of the Middle Eastern countries today, but Prabhupāda said that all governments are condemned because of their lack of Kṛṣṇa consciousness. It is not enough to practice the principles of strong leadership stripped of their spiritual foundation. “At the present moment all over the world, governments have no respect for brāhmaṇas, cows and Govinda, and consequently, there are chaotic conditions all over the world.” (SB 6.7.24, purport)
Prabhupada is often quoted as describing the present system of democracy as “demon-crazy,” but it is simplistic to think that this sums up Prabhupada’s whole attitude towards democracy. He also described a system of democracy as it appeared in Vedic culture, one that would consider the votes of the learned persons in society. Democracy as it is applied today is ridiculous and ineffective, and it actually slows down the process of government.
A simple example of how the vox populi hinders the government’s ability to protect the citizens can be seen in something so simple as the seat belt law in the United States. It has been proven that people who have car accidents while wearing seat belts survive with less injury by a significant margin than those who do not wear seat belts; yet, the American population considers it an interference of their civil liberties to have the government impose seat belt legislation, even though the government is doing so to protect the citizens. The United States government, which has such a grandiose image in the rest of the world, cannot even pass laws to protect its own citizens from killing themselves.
It is hard to imagine Mahārāja Parīkṣit having to deal with such issues. And even if he did, he was not the autocrat of a submissive, trembling kingdom; he was the servant of the brahmaṇas who gave him good, detached, Kṛṣṇa conscious advice.
According to the Vedic version, monarchy is the best form of government. But Prabhupada also recognized the fact that nowadays, no Kṛṣṇa conscious monarch is available, so representational government is necessary. His main point was that those who possessed the power to vote should be educated in the process of government and also in spiritual culture. Otherwise, what is the meaning of their sentimental votes? In India when Indira Gandhi’s dictatorship was voted out, people were hopeful about the democratic society. But Prabhupāda was not. He spoke about this:
Again elections, as if election will change their quality. Let them remain rascals and simply by election replace one rascal with another rascal. Let them remain rascals but get votes… The population is śva-viḍ-varāhoṣṭra, and they are giving vote, another big paśu. This is democracy… The tiger was president. Now the lion is president and both of them are animals. Where is the man, the human being?… They say, “Oh, now there is lion. Now the tiger is driven away.” Now there is lion. This is going on. (Śrīla Prabhupāda-līlāmṛta, vol.6, p. 301)
It appears that Prabhupāda advocated democracy within ISKCON, however. He told Hayagrīva that monarchy was out of date in this age. He said that if you have to live together, you have to work together In Kali-yuga, everything should be managed by society.”
pp. 578-82
Haribol. Arrived at Gita-nagari last night. Rose 12:30 A.M. and dictated until 2:15! Rough draft begun! My dear Lord Krsna, I pray bombs don’t drop and civilization doesn’t collapse as You let me be rapt in this meditation on Prabhupada. My memory is going, my devotion was never great, but I contend that the biography is service to him.
I try to keep at my work, consciousness fixed in worship by gathering his history and compiling it in hopes that books can be published and the world benefited. Motive is pure when, like Prabhupada, I desire to help the world by serving his movement. You must be a transparent via medium and then Krsna and parampara will bless you to compile the Srila Prabhupada-lilamrta. Otherwise, it will fail.
Many times I have written of personal inadequacy although I am guru. Guru has to repeat the message of Krsna unchanged. Bhurijana said my writing the biography was like the way Prabhupada started this movement—from scratch, not sure at first how it would all develop. The difficulty of this volume is that Srila Prabhupada is not that manifest in the early years in his full potency. The reader may ask, “Why doesn’t he join and live with his spiritual master right away? Why is he doing business?” The answer to the question is an esoteric one. Krsna had His plan to prepare His pure devotee and send him to America at exactly the right time, which would be in 1965. I am so far not writing in such a way (as Krsnadasa Kaviraja was) as to explain esoteric meanings. His earliest childhood of worshiping Radha-Govinda is already recorded, and I won’t be shy about bringing it up and making a connection, but in the way I am compiling things now, I wouldn’t come out and say he was detained all the years in India in family life because of the inscrutable plan of the Lord. Nor will I come out and say he was a divine avatara, the one among all the disciples of Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati Thakura who would go to the West and do so many great things. That is a way to do things, and some biographies are done in that way. I could look more at samples of the different ways to do it.
I claim I hunger to write always about Srila Prabhupada, and yet I do not. Other leaders engage in other ways, especially at this time when ISKCON is trying to find its footing anew and recapture some good opinion from the public, who have dubbed us a “cult” and “money-hustlers.” They do not think of us in any other way, and neither do they hear from us as respectable persons. Leaders branch out in different ways. Just today, Rupanuga said he wanted to go to Cambodia to distribute prasadam to the starving refugees. He said he has to preach. He said our leaders tend to be “holed up,” not out preaching. No one wants to hear from us due to the bad opinion they have of us from our book distribution methods, and no one can preach unless we devise some new way to gain credence by the people. It is a time of searching and trying to reach out in a way to preach that will move the people to our side, and not that they think of us as the lowest class of people.
Tomorrow is the first of the year. Then we take a day of celebration here—lecture, initiation, festivities. Go in a day to Detroit for association with my GBC Godbrothers. A total of five days away from biography work, but if the Lord desires, I will come back more determined than ever to work at the biography. 179 pages of the first draft are done and the road ahead seems clear. There is much work, but is not this work great pleasure?
This is the secret of devotional service. Krsna has been very, very kind to me. I should not envy anyone or be in the slightest ungrateful. I have received great mercy. I want to describe Prabhupada’s life as a service to the Vaisnava community and for preaching to the whole world. I am being allowed to do it. I am very thankful. I pray to be allowed to go on with it; for that reason I pray there be no disturbances to the work of Srila Prabhupada-lilamrta. I can take these five days without anxiety that I am away from my main work, but even in this time, if there is a chance, let me read my research materials and try to work at it. Jaya Prabhupada. Let me write more and more from all periods about you, and mainly the work in progress, but I beg to have an overrunning cup of your pastimes constantly flowing like the creek water in my backyard and the spring water in my front yard.
pp. 7-11
Joyce wrote, “Old father, old artificer, stand me now and ever in good stead . . . to forge in the smithy of my soul the uncreated conscience of my race.”
Then, father and son, will you preach in various spots, pubs and parks, halls and auditoriums, using a Mouse amp to project your voice as you lecture on transmigration and other topics?
I will,
I will,
and I’ll walk and talk.
No bull except the one that pulls the bullock cart?
And I will stay out when it rains. This is a real pada-
yatra
of the imagination,
no blisters except those on the fingers of the right
hand where it grips the pen.
I told that devotee who complained that he had a
right to freedom of expression, but I let him know how
a brother felt when he was attacked. It’s good to know
these things so we can become offenseless.
Peace. We are not alone.
I’m surely not. Sometimes I feel like I have a police
escort with this blue and black ink, and chanting Hare
Krsna puts me in touch with Radha and Krsna and
Their entourage
and countless billions
of stars in outer space.
Not alone, but a tiny integer
related to others.
Surely not alone.
Someone removed stains from my kurta and sewed on a loose button. This house has a host, this pen (Sheaffer) a maker. The Seiko ticks, the bone and sinew from nature are raw sometimes.
I walk
and speak
and pray
in context,
impelled by a deep river where flows an apparent
haphazard mixture of truth-reaching words.
Oh, my soul
I have no slippers.
I’m not really irreverent.
I’m reforming.
I’ll be reforming
because I want to go back to Godhead.
Love of God comes by offering
the deepest volition of self—
surrender in action. It’s a long haul.
I heard the BBC crew went to Inis Rath and met one devotee from Latvia and another from Brazil. What’s the point of a North Irish TV station hearing from such people? Then they heard that all the northerners were living in the south. They came down and were enthralled to hear the old stories they were seeking—of boyhood and youth, of grief and conversion, all from North Irish Hare Krsnas.
I hear Prabhupada via tape talking to devotees on his own walk in Germany. He says something my brain finds hard to logically accept. He says there is no objection to transmigration. He asks you what “they” say. You speak up for the agnostics, but you know they will never be satisfied by whatever sastra or guru says. Therefore, you can’t play devil’s advocate for long. Your own brain is the devil, but you just want to accept whatever guru and sastra says.
My own disciples sometimes say that it’s too much to accept me in an absolute way. They need to be assured that sometimes they don’t need to measure up exactly to what I say. They want to keep their own opinions.
Okay.
But Srila Prabhupada says only a damned fool will disagree with his guru. I was on that German walk. I said, “Transmigration is not proved by Krsna’s example that as a boy grows into a youth and a youth grows into a man, so the self reappears in the next body. It is only an analogy and analogies don’t prove truth.”
Why don’t you accept?” Prabhupada asked.
Because a person can perceive that he’s growing old, but he can’t perceive that he takes another body. We have no memory or perception of dying and being reborn.
Srila Prabhupada replied with another analogy. (“Yes,” I hear that voice in my head start up: “Indian philosophy loves analogies.”) In a dream you think you are in a different body and you perceive fear. Sometimes you are so afraid that you wake up. Is this not proof that you have perception of the body changing? Prabhupada spoke with emotion, and I felt myself dropping the role of skeptic and becoming submissive. Yes, he is right.
But my mind didn’t drop out entirely. Did I actually think he proved one analogy by giving another? The dream perception is certainly an experience and does add to the Lord’s argument, but it is still not proof that we die and are reborn with the same self. It is only proof that when we sleep, the same self accepts different subtle identities for awhile. The dream state does not prove transmigration. Prabhupada seemed to say that it was enough.
It doesn’t matter, though, because I do accept it. I accept it because he said it, and not because of the example itself.
Perhaps Prabhupada wants me to surrender to what he says and to follow Krsna’s orders. He may want me to take whatever examples help. Well, that much I can do. I don’t really have to prove that I have no power to perceive the truth of what they say. Krsna tells Arjuna, “Many, many lives both you and I have had. I can remember all of them, but you cannot.”
pp. 37-40
On the occasion of my sannyasa initiation in May 1972, I started another diary.
In the early pages of this 1972 diary, I made notes from Prabhupada’s lectures and talks while we were together in Los Angeles.”
Eating: Don’t overeat in the name of prasadam. Eating when you are not hungry is like poison. When you are hungry you’ll eat any damn thing.
Much of what I recorded has to do with sannyasa life. Clearly, Srlla Prabhupada was preparing young men for sannyasa in order that they should preach. There was no idea that we would now become recluses.
“There will be so many questions and opposing elements.”
He gave an example to show the preacher is the best devotee, and gets special consideration from the Lord: just as the soldiers in Germany got butter even if no one else got it, so too would the preachers attract Krsna’s attention.
First thing is enthusiasm. Don’t be dead He said “You have to work more than me. Anyone who has life, he can preach. I said to my Godbrothers—you are all dead. You have no strength, no life what have you done? Because I am trying my best, blessing is coming from my Guru Maharaj. It is not to be advertised but seen.”
Simply touring is not required. By traveling we have to do something substantial to increase this Society. [We must spread conviction by literature, speaking and preaching. The preacher is the best devotee because he is the soldier. We have to be spiritually strong. If superficially we want to be managers, it won’t be good.
Don’t try to be the proprietor of bricks and wood. That is not life. Preach.
Go and preach
Go and preach
Go and preach!
A Vaisnava doesn’t stop activity. He changes it. A businessman is touring all over the world, and so are we. He travels to get orders for business, we for pushing on Krsna consciousness. Saintly life doesn’t mean stopping activity. The politicians use a big meeting hall and we need one to speak about Krsna consciousness.
I met with Ekatvam and Madhava dasa, devotees from Puerto Rico who attended the sankirtana festival. They have both recently taken wives, and so we talked mostly about that. Then Madhava inquired, “Do you forget us?”
I wanted to say, “No, I never forget you,” but at first I groped. I gave the example of how Akrura remembered Krsna when he saw the Lord’s footprints in the dust of Vrndavana. Although I asserted that I don’t forget my disciples, yet on a lesser level of human fallibility, I may forget. Even Srila Prabhupada, who was the perfect guru and pure devotee, would sometimes ask, “Is that one of our men?” Or he would even ask one of his disciples, “What is your name?” That was not imperfection on his part. He generously took thousands of disciples and never forgot for a moment that he was living to serve them, bringing them to Krsna. He worked always for his disciples, as well as for all conditioned souls.
The basis on which I answered Madhava’s question, therefore, was hearing from authority. This is knowledge beyond imperfect sense perception. We know we are serving Krsna and guru because we have heard it from them. We may not directly see that Krsna eats the prasadam we offer, but we know He eats in His own transcendental way. If we don’t see, it is because our senses are not yet purified. Similarly, if we serve the guru’s order, we may see and hear our guru is pleased with us, or we may simply have faith in this—trust that he will accept our offering and give it to Krsna. We don’t doubt or take the guru in parampara as an ordinary person. He is linked in the transcendental system, and his own connection to Krsna is the way we connect in devotional service. So the basis of spiritual knowledge and reciprocation is faithful hearing and submissively acting upon it.
It is also a mystic potency by which I can act as guru for my disciples. It is not ordinary officiating. Even if I forget a disciple’s name, or cannot say exactly what they are doing at every moment, the essence of the spiritual relationship is vital and alive. The real factor for me is whether I maintain exemplary behavior. If I act as representative of Krsna for them, then the via media channel is ever open for their service to go through me to Srila Prabhupada and to Krsna. I am simply the menial servant, but by chanting, hearing, and serving—and by right behavior—I may serve others who approach me for Krsna conscious guidance, as long as the instruction I give is exactly what I have heard from Srila Prabhupada. This potency is even beyond my own perception of it, although sometimes we can know it directly.
pp. 37-41
Srila Prabhupada has advised us to hear and recite the standard prayers in Vaisnava parampara, such as the prayers of the Brahma-samhita and the many prayers contained in the Srimad-Bhagavatam. He has also encouraged us to pray in our own words: “With devotion one should feel, ‘God is great, and I am very small. Therefore my duty is to offer prayers to the Lord’” (Bhag. 7.9.12, purport).
Because one goes to God through the guru, it seems more natural to offer prayers to the spiritual master. How can I dare to directly address Sri Krsna? Prabhupada says it is our duty. And Prahlada Maharaja states, “Anyone who has been forced by ignorance to enter the material world may be purified of material life if he offers prayers to the Lord and hears the Lord’s glories” (Bhag. 7.9.12).
With this in mind, one may begin. But we should also always be aware that whatever prayers we make will be inferior to the best prayers already composed.
My prayers may be taken as additional proof to the Srimad-Bhagavatam statement that devotional service may be practiced in all circumstances, by all living beings, including the demons, the beastly species, and the fallen souls.
Although I am enveloped by the modes of passion and ignorance, and although I actually have little desire to glorify You, I have nevertheless composed these pretended prayers, posing myself as a great devotee eager to praise You. O Supreme Lord, O maintainer of the earth, even though these prayers are a sham, please accept them anyway, and please also teach my mind how to properly glorify You.
—Stotra-ratna, Text 56, Srila Yamunacarya
My dear Lord Krsna,
I appreciate the prayers of all
Your sincere devotees,
who address You as “most high,
all powerful good Lord,”
and who address You by many titles
such as God, Creator,
Jehovah, Allah,
Brahma, Visnu and so on,
and who approach You through many mediums,
such as the son of God, the prophet, or the guru.
Out of the multi-addresses
and many appearances
and manifestations of Yourself,
I have become most fortunate to see You
and worship You, and call upon You
as Lord Krsna.
I pray to You as Krsna
because the name Krsna means “all-attractive,”
and because in Your form of Krsna,
You offer the most intimate exchanges of love
with Your best devotees.
Besides, my spiritual master has taught me
according to the Vedic scriptures,
krsnas to bhagavan svayam.
Chanting Your names
is the only remedy for those
who are rotting here in birth and death.
Dear Supreme Lord Krsna,
I pray for connection and Your grace
so that I may actually praise You
for Your pleasure
and the pleasure of my Guru Maharaja.
Dear Lord,
my time is running out.
What shall I do?
Is this mediocrity?
What shall I do?
My dear Lord Krsna, please
let me remember You
in the morning before mangala-arati,
and when I chant Your holy names.
Please let me remember You
when I bathe and dress and when
I apply tilaka in twelve places.
When remnants of thoughts
pass through my mind,
let them fly to You
or else be gone!
Please let me remember You
as the greatest, always a person,
the oldest but eternally young,
the best philosopher,
who has been fulfilling everyone’s desires
since time beyond memory.
Please allow me to live with You
in devotional service
as taught to me by my eternal guide,
Prabhupada.
Let me pray to You,
and talk with You as Your servant
every day.
Please shed light today
on my way, so I can chant Hare Krsna
and be with You.
Allow me to be with You;
let me hold to You today.
All glories to You, Sri Krsna,
You performed all the acts
described in sastra
and eternally You perform them.
I will read the sastra with faith,
and if I can speak or write today,
let me explain
and expand the meaning of parampara.
In this busy world,
as I seek to be free of maya’s grasp,
please be with me.
—19 April 1988
pp. 377-81
I painted a Radha-Krsna and an outright abstract with no personal forms. It is trying. He read about Krsna punishing Kaliya, putting out the forest fire and lifting Govardhana hill. All His adventures are superhuman. He is always like a fresh youth, even in old age. One who knows the nature of His activities goes back to Godhead. I believe in Krsna from guru, sastra, and sadhu. Krsna is a person. He is also the impersonal brahmajyoti. We had apple dumpings. I am a sorry case. We are painting pictures of krsna-lila. Next is the rasa. They will be beautiful and esoteric. I will post them on the web. Krsna is the cynosure of all eyes in Vraja-bhumi. Dina-bandhu knows all the lilas. He is a walking fountainhead of bhava. He lives in Vrndavana. Many devotees live there and pass their time in bhajana-sadhana. I too do, living comfortably in New York. My eyes strained from drawing and painting. Visitors will come here, and we’ll talk. Let no one come to harass me. I want to be peaceful. Saci’s 80-year-old father wants to move. Where will he go? I look out through my glasses. I stick my used brushes in a bucket of water. I work a half hour doing exercises with Saci. I really don’t like lifting the eight-pound barbells. Then at the end I punch. Hare Krsna comes straight from Krsnaloka. He will be back soon. Staring dumb at the white page. Hemingway didn’t like Tom Sawyer. He’s hoping, by his activities in helping Jimmy Stewart, the angel can earn his wings. At the end, he does. I just want an honest exchange. When do we see the website? Do your best. I like seeing Jagannatha. The book manuscript has to be in by November. They had a funeral ceremony for mother Isha in Boston. I look out at the world and chant and write my poem. Shadow is barking. His dog life. This evening spot for my journal writing is not the best.
It’s my niche, 6:18 p.m., for making words. I painted another abstract with rollers, a minimum, ungainly figures on harinama “in the rain.” That is, I splashed them profusely with spray paint over their heads and dripping down. I didn’t do much brushwork but mostly sticks. They were all right, a little bare. We get much medicine from Prabhupada’s relentless purports. God is a person who can only be known by devotional service, not by speculation. No one can estimate the powers of the Supreme. Many devotees went to Anartha’s birthday party. I have no voice, not metaphor or legend. I finished a simple drawing. He constructed a sculpture, “A Rastafarian waiting for Ratha-yatra to come to his town.” Assembled by parts of art he found around, and he finished black Lord Jagannatha, who will be held by Lord Caitanya. I have mail to answer. The birds are chirping, and the sunshine is beating on Saci’s front porch. His son plays basketball and baseball, and Saci attends the games. We gathered for lunch, but it wasn’t very good. I’m aspiring to transfer to the eternal spiritual world. Take the mainstream of Srimad-Bhagavatam, which describes the credible events which we accept as true on the authority of guru, sastra, and sadhu. Every day we read the extraordinary. Lord Siva is “the king of the atheists,” and he also is the greatest Vaisnava. The thick little Lord Jagannatha he has painted nicely, black in face.
Readers will find, in the Appendix of this book, scans of a cover letter written by Satsvarūpa Mahārāja to the GN Press typist at the time, along with some of the original handwritten pages of June Bug. Together, these help to illustrate the process used by Mahārāja when writing his books during this period. These were timed books, in the sense that a distinct time period was allotted for the writing, during SDG’s travels as a visiting sannyāsī
Don’t take my pieces away from me. I need them dearly. My pieces are my prayers to Kṛṣṇa. He wants me to have them, this is my way to love Him. Never take my pieces away.
Many planks and sticks, unable to stay together, are carried away by the force of a river’s waves. Similarly, although we are intimately related with friends and family members, we are unable to stay together because of our varied past deeds and the waves of time.
To Śrīla Prabhupāda, who encouraged his devotees (including me) To write articles and books about Kṛṣṇa Consciousness.
I wrote him personally and asked if it was alright for his disciples to write books, Since he, our spiritual master, was already doing that. He wrote back and said that it was certainly alright For us to produce books.
I have a personal story to tell. It is a about a time (January–July 1974) I spent as a personal servant and secretary of my spiritual master, His Divine Grace A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupäda, founder-äcärya of the International Society for Krishna Consciousness. Although I have written extensively about Çréla Prabhupäda, I’ve hesitated to give this account, for fear it would expose me as a poor disciple. But now I’m going ahead, confident that the truth will purify both my readers and myself.
First published by The Gītā-nāgarī Press/GN Press in serialized form in the magazine Among Friends between 1996 and 2001, Best Use of a Bad Bargain is collected here for the first time in this new edition. This volume also contains essays written by Satsvarūpa dāsa Goswami for the occasional periodical, Hope This Meets You in Good Health, between 1994 and 2002, published by the ISKCON Health and Welfare Ministry.
This book has two purposes: to arouse our transcendental feelings of separation from a great personality, Śrīla Prabhupāda, and to encourage all sincere seekers of the Absolute Truth to go forward like an army under the banner of His Divine Grace A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupāda and the Kṛṣṇa consciousness movement.
A single volume collection of the Nimai novels.
Śrīla Prabhupāda was in the disciplic succession from the Brahmā-Mādhva-Gauḍīya sampradāya, the Vaiṣṇavas who advocate pure devotion to God and who understand Kṛṣṇa as the Supreme Personality of Godhead. He always described himself as simply a messenger who carried the paramparā teachings of his spiritual master and Lord Kṛṣṇa.
Dear Srila Prabhupada,
Please accept this or it’s worse than useless.
You have given me spiritual life
and so my time is yours.
You want me to be happy in Krishna consciousness
You want me to spread Krishna consciousness,
This collection of Satsvarūpa dāsa Goswami’s writings is comprised of essays that were originally published in Back to Godhead magazine between 1966 and 1978, and compiled in 1979 by Gita Nagari Press as the volume A Handbook for Kṛṣṇa Consciousness.
This second volume of Satsvarūpa dāsa Goswami’s Back to Godhead essays encompasses the last 11 years of his 20-year tenure as Editor-in-Chief of Back to Godhead magazine. The essays in this book consist mostly of SDG’s ‘Notes from the Editor’ column, which was typically featured towards the end of each issue starting in 1978 and running until Mahārāja retired from his duties as editor in 1989.
This collection of Satsvarupa dasa Goswami’s writings is comprised of essays that were originally published in Back to Godhead magazine between 1991 and 2002, picking up where Volume 2 leaves off. The volume is supplemented by essays about devotional service from issues of Satsvarupa dasa Goswami’s magazine, Among Friends, published in the 1990s.
“This is a different kind of book, written in my old age, observing Kṛṣṇa consciousness and assessing myself. I believe it fits under the category of ‘Literature in pursuance of the Vedic version.’ It is autobiography, from a Western-raised man, who has been transformed into a devotee of Kṛṣṇa by Śrīla Prabhupāda.”
The Best I Could DoI want to study this evolution of my art, my writing. I want to see what changed from the book In Search of the Grand Metaphor to the next book, The Last Days of the Year.
a Hare Krishna ManIt’s world enlightenment day
And devotees are giving out books
By milk of kindness, read one page
And your life can become perfect.
Calling Out to Srila Prabhupada: Poems and PrayersO Prabhupāda, whose purports are wonderfully clear, having been gathered from what was taught by the previous ācāryas and made all new; O Prabhupāda, who is always sober to expose the material illusion and blissful in knowledge of Kṛṣṇa, may we carefully read your Bhaktivedanta purports.
I use free-writing in my devotional service as part of my sādhana. It is a way for me to enter those realms of myself where only honesty matters; free-writing enables me to reach deeper levels of realization by my repeated attempt to “tell the truth quickly.” Free-writing takes me past polished prose. It takes me past literary effect. It takes me past the need to present something and allows me to just get down and say it. From the viewpoint of a writer, this dropping of all pretense is desirable.
Geaglum Free WriteThis edition of Satsvarūpa dāsa Goswami’s 1996 timed book, Geaglum Free Write Diary, is published as part of a legacy project to restore Satsvarūpa Mahārāja’s writings to ‘in print’ status and make them globally available for current and future readers.