His Holiness Satsvarupa dasa Goswami Maharaja
Vyasa-puja Birthday Celebration
Saturday, December 7, 2024What
Meeting of Disciples and friends of SDG
Where
The Veterans of Foreign Wars Hall
845 Hudson Avenue
Stuyvesant Falls, New York 12174There is plenty of parking near the Hall. The facility is just a few minutes’ walk from SDG’s home at 909 Albany Ave.
Schedule
- 10:00 –10:30 A.M.: Kirtana
- 10:30 – 11:15 A.M.: Presentation by Satsvarupa Maharaja
- 11:15 – 12:30 A.M.: Book Table
- 12:30 – 1:15 P.M.: Arati and kirtana
- 1:15 – 2:15 P.M.: Prasadam Feast
Contact
Baladeva Vidyabhusana at [email protected] or (518) 754-1108
Krsna dasi at [email protected] or (518) 822-7636
“The good news for Satsvarupa Maharaja this week was that he had headaches on only three days. The medium news is that the disorientation continues and seems focused on working the buttons on his dictation machines. Let us see. The bad news was that he experienced another fall. This time, he collapsed and was falling toward the bedside table quickly, so I went into emergency mode, grabbed him around the ribs, and was at least able to make it to the edge of the bed. But he ended up with several bruised ribs and a scare. When will it happen again? Will someone be there to catch him?
Even though it was a rocky week, he still squeezed out some fine writing, including some personal commentary on favorite verses.
Thank you,
ys,
Baladeva
I pray to my own mind, “Please be kind. Please act for our welfare (not our destruction) by patiently hearing the sound of the Names and surrendering your propensity to wander all over the universe in search of mental food and plans for sensual enjoyment. Please be a servant of the Vaisnavas.”
******
When I said gayatri, my mind roamed elsewhere, to an advertisement for a book about baseball. Then it was too late. But I could perceive that you can bring the mind back from one preoccu-pation and fix it somewhere else. Lord Krsna refers to the austerities of the mind. Prabhupada says we have to divert the mind to the Vedic literatures.
It’s strange how the mind goes. It doesn’t always go to things I love or which are of interest to me. Rather, it has a nondiscriminating curiosity. As a goat eats anything, the mind “eats” anything. It turns it over, sniffs at it. . . . Roaming through the worlds, without scruples, without considering my self-interest. I may bring myself to a nice situation, but the mind doesn’t come along, or it comes only part of the way. For example, we will take a japa walk on the beach. The mind will appreciate this along with the senses. But that doesn’t mean it will agree to hear the holy names. It will do its usual jumping from one train car to another. If I really bear down on the purpose of this japa retreat, I will see it as a stark battle between the higher self and the cañcala mind. Am I ready to engage in hand-to-hand combat? I don’t think so. I am hoping to win the mind over on friendly terms. Hope to gradually appeal to the mind and receive a drop of Krsna’s mercy. One drop will inundate the mind with pleasure, and it will gladly become a devotee. By force of attraction to the Name and form and lila of Krsna, the mind will give up its roaming and devouring, its sniffing in the garbage pails. I am trying for that. But until the drop of nectar falls, I will have to bring the mind back whenever I notice it roaming away and do something Krsna conscious. Writing is for that, and reading. Chanting Hare Krsna is the most direct and easiest method of associating with Krsna, but I can’t convince the mind to do it.
******
I have chanted twelve rounds. I’m very sorry I have this pain, which is so distracting to smooth chanting. I cannot sink deeply into peaceful contemplation of Krsna’s qualities and form. . . . Let me go on chanting for now, and I can rest later.
Chanting with a handicap. It
still counts in your favor. The
Lord sees you are trying
despite a bodily defect.
You long to reach pure chanting
and pray that day will come.
In the meantime, through
stuffed sinuses you savor
hari-nama.
******
Good mechanical chanting is not suddha -nama, but it’s important. It means you’re attentive, concentrated and conscientious. Today I’ve been chanting with good mechanics, and I’m gratified. Since I started a little late, I’ve only chanted eleven rounds, but I’m sure I’ll make them up later–with good mechanics.
Chanting “mechanically” sounds derogatory.
But if you chant well-tuned, you’re on the
good side. You handle each mantra with
care, like a part of an assembly line.
You’ve got a long way to go to chanting
with bhava, but you’ve made a good start.
Chanting as duty, the mind on the count,
struggling to keep alert. This chanting is
not what Prabhupada said would equal
Dhruva’s austerity. You completed your
assignment, but not with the presence of
mind that, “Here is Krsna, here is Radha,
please engage me in Your service.”
******
I received a nice letter from Malati Prabhu. She agreed to meet with me at the Gita-nagari Ratha-yatra. She enclosed a nice japa prayer by Jagattarini Prabhu: “Dear Lord, these are my rounds, and they aren’t so good at the moment, but they are the best I can offer.” I thought that was a sweet sentiment, expressing one’s inability but humbly offering the best one can do to Krsna.
******
In Hari-nama-cintamani, Chapter Two, Haridasa Thakura talks about the glories of namabhasa, or shadow chanting. Bhaktivinode Thakura discusses many technical varieties of namabhasa, and he says it should not be underestimated. Some of the categories include negligent chanting and even chanting in jest. He says namabhasa can bring liberation. So I thought it was best to persist in chanting. I could not concentrate on prayer, but clung to the holy names like a life raft and proceeded at a rapid pace.
******
My spiritual master has taught us the importance of preaching, and he has given us stern orders to carry it out according to our individual capacities. He has also taught us Lord Caitanya’s method of chanting the holy names. It is easy to reach You by this method, O Lord, but somehow we find it difficult. I pray to gain facility in hari-nama and to infuse it with some emotions of love for You and Srimati Radharani. Let me pray Hare Krsna, Hare Krsna, Krsna Krsna, Hare Hare. Let me pray Hare Rama, Hare Rama, Rama Rama, Hare Hare. The prayer means, “O Lord, O energy of the Lord, please engage me in Your service.” Let me enter the prayer-meaning and carry it out by Your strength infused in me.
******
Speak of the new confidence and responsibility you gained in the meetings in Italy. Take on your duties and expect your disciples to reciprocate with you. Haryasva is stressing that my disciples and I are together in japa and that I should speak on that. It is a strong point, and actually I believe in it. I believe in the importance of japa in my own life and in our bond. As Srila Prabhupada said to us in 1967 when he was going to India and we feared separation from him, “I will be chanting in India, and you will be chanting here, and we will be packed up together.” They can read my books, which offer guidance and personal relationship. They can keep the basic vows of their initiation. They can write letters to me and tell me of their lives. We can meet on occasions like this. Vapuh and vani. I am here to rededicate myself to being your spiritual master, and I hope that you will rededicate yourself to being my disciples. Talk like that.
******
March mayhem; it’s already spring. I feel alert for more chanting. I really don’t know what the chant is. It is Sanskrit words for Krsna and His Consort. It’s a mystery to me. I enunciate them in a “foreign” tongue. But it’s not actually foreign, it’s transcendental. I chant with trust in the acaryas and the scriptures. They speak in highest terms of the purifying power of the holy names. It is an offense in chanting to consider the glories of the holy names to be exaggeration. You chant like a little baby, doing what your father and mother have told you to do. Eventually, you’re supposed to grow up and have some realizations of the sweetness and potency. Until it comes, you cry for it. Or until you cry, you pray, “Please let me cry for it.” Until you pray, you are chanting with offenses. But even that is beneficial.
pp. 2
The practice of prayer is bound to stir up some difficulties. Most of them arise within oneself and some may come in relation to others. The greatest difficulty is that because of encountering difficulties, one will entirely stop the practice of prayer. As with most obstacles in the path of perfection, one should consult with one’s spiritual master for guidance. And if one wants at all to continue the practice of prayer, one should follow Rupa Gosvami’s first principles for favorable devotional service as taught in Upadesamrta, utsahan niscayad dhairyat, “being enthusiastic, endeavoring with confidence, and being patient.”
We have already mentioned Bhaktivinoda Thakura’s definition of distraction as a form of pramada caused by attraction to material desires. It is another action of the uncontrolled mind.
We sit for japa (or prayer recitation or personal prayer), make a good start at coming into the presence of Krsna and guru, when suddenly we find ourselves out in left field as if blown there by a gust of wind. Instead of thinking of Krsna, we are chewing on our cud or in the midst of malicious thoughts. There is no remedy for this except to become a pure devotee and perfect yogi whose every thought is connected favorably to Krsna, an0d who is never distracted.
In the stage of perfection called trance, or samadhi, one’s mind is completely restrained from material mental activities by practice of yoga. This perfection is characterized by one’s ability to see the self by the pure mind and to relish and rejoice in the self. In that joyous state, one is situated in boundless transcendental happiness, realized through transcendental senses. Established thus, one never departs from the truth, and upon gaining this he thinks there is no greater gain. Being situated in such a position, one is never shaken, even in the midst of greatest difficulty. This indeed is actual freedom from all miseries arising from material contact. —Bg. 6.20-23
Until we reach that stage, our remedy is to endure and never give up. There is also a distinction between involuntary distraction and voluntary indulgence in distraction. If we find that we have gone off the track in prayer because of some external interruption or stray thoughts, we shouldn’t remain there, but return to our Krsna conscious thoughmthat much is within our power.
Even advanced souls will be subjected to distractions while in the material world, but the sage of steady mind goes on with his convictions. As described by Lord Krsna, “A person who is not disturbed by the incessant flow of desires—that enter like rivers into the ocean, which is ever being filled but is always still—can alone achieve peace, and not the man who strives to satisfy such desires.” (Bg. 2.70)
Even if our japa is filled with distractions, Krsna is pleased with our repeated attempts to bring the mind back under the control of the holy name.
Japa and prayer are potent and sometimes we shy away from them thinking, “They will bring me ‘too quickly into Krsna’s presence and He will force me to surrender.” On the surface,’ this fear seems laughable, but for some, it is quite real. I already like the service Tarn doing for Krsna, infact I love it. But what if he wants me to change and do something else? If I pray to Krsna to teach me His way, I rnay beforcedIo renounce more Than I want to. In fact, Lord Krsna states that if allevotee ‘serves Him sincerely but still retains material ambitions, Krsna’s first mercy on him is to crush him, “and thus the wretched fellow has no one to turn to-bat Me.” A statement like this may enforce the fears of surrendering to surrender as something too harsh. But Lord Krsna further states that He will replace the material attachments with “the taste of My lotus feet.” In other words, Krsna will make us supremely happy if we surrender to Him, even if in the beginning we are a bit panicky about losing our material attachments.
Our actual predicament in material life is already fearful, surrounded as we are by dangers and miseries of birth, death, disease, and old age. Prayer doesn’t increase our fears; but gives us shelter in the Supreme. As for surrendering to the Supreme; Krsna will, give us the strength to do that; as we serve •and pray, “Please give me the strength the serve You.”
pp. 318-22
“In Vrndavana,” you wrote,
“we are attempting to build a temple
for our disciples throughout the world.”
Lord Chaitanya also wished
His disciples to visit the dham,
and He asked Rupa and Sanatan
to live there and receive them.
Some of the greatest Vaisnavas—Ramananda Ray,
Haridas Thakur, Srivas, and Gadadhar—
always saw Vrndavana in their minds,
although they never traveled there.
Your own devotees,
although living in the West
in mundane cities like Paris and L.A.,
were also always in Vrndavana
by living in the temples,
but by your mercy
now all could journey to Vrndavana
to a place so wonderful
even the neophyte would be inspired
to understand the real Vrndavana.
To understand the real Vrndavana!
At least you gave us the chance.
And now the work was done.
On Rama Navami in ’75
your heart was thrilled
when you reached Raman Reti
and beheld the mandir domes,
monuments of victory
rising in grace and strength,
proclaiming: “Here is the temple
of Krishna and Balaram!
Stay here and worship the Brothers!
Rama and Krishna are Gaura-Nitai!”
In the evening you led
a procession—
blazing torches, shenai music,
elephants, 600 devotees—
to the center of the crowded town,
inviting Brijibasis
to the next day’s opening.
Your room was crowded,
and every moment you were busy.
You even put your writing aside
and received special guests,
heard reports on the thousands
of installation details,
and met with your leaders,
hearing their urgent news of preaching
in dozens of needy countries.
None of this seemed a burden on you,
but was constant, ecstatic santadhi.
You stressed the real celebration
was of kirtan, prasadam distribution,
and the great chance to preach.
More than the rituals of the brahmanas,
it was the Hare Krishna kirtan
that would inaugurate the worship.
“Do it for 24 hours each day!”
The opulent, transcendental forms
of the ten deities were bathed and dressed,
after three days of mantras and preparations,
and finally you were asked
to perform the opening arati.
You were also transcendentally
dressed in shiny saffron silk
and decorated also with the natural glories
of pure love of Krishna
as you entered the Deity room.
Conchshells blasted,
the large doors opened.
and thousands of roaring devotees
cheered your presence before the Lord.
It was no routine arati.
The ecstatic mood increased
as you held each article
in your upraised hand.
And as you turned, after offering to the Lord,
and offered each holy article before the crowd,
the devotees all cheered,
congratulating you
with shouts of appreciation
for what you were doing:
giving the breath of life,
giving the gift of darshan
in open audience with the Lord.
The newly-elected Governor,
surrounded by his guard
of 50 drab-tan soldiers,
was also swept along
in the rushing waves,
the sights and sounds of spiritual bliss.
Krishna and Balaram,
beautiful Black and White,
stood under a golden canopy,
Balaram’s left hand resting
on His gnarled cowherd’s rod,
as He leaned on His strong, younger Brother,
who held His jolly flute before His mouth.
Both Brothers,
covered with fragrant garlands of roses,
allowed us to worship
Their visible lotus feet.
Srila Prabhupada,
you offered each article so nicely,
holding up the flaming ghee lamps,
sprinkling the water on our heads.
Pure bhakti was flowing
from you to us
and from us to you
and spilling over
to onlookers, who also joined
by the force of the event.
As you turned and waved
the chamara to the crowd,
your smile—
coming straight from your worship
of the Raman Reti Lords—
showed you were in the real Vrndavana.
You couldn’t hide it—
you were in Vrndavana with Krishna-Balaram,
and we could also see!
By the time you offered the peacock fan.
the crowd was tumultuous.
Then, quieting the audience,
you spoke. even while standing
in the intimacy of Their altar.
This is an international temple,
you said. Everyone can come
and worship here. It is not
restricted by sectarian views.
Everyone should come and
chant Hare Krishna.
After that, as you requested.
continuous kirtans tested
the strongest singers and dancers,
while prasadam was served
to the thousands of guests.
The Krishna-Balaram Mandir
and international guesthouse
was now an operating life,
never to cease in its service.
And I can imagine
the deep satisfaction
felt by you
and those who served you
dearly through years of striving
to bring this about.
But I can remember
the following morning
you went out to walk
and informed us all
of our special relation to Krishna-Balaram.
Balaram, you said,
is the source of spiritual strength,
and we should pray to Him
in our weakness.
Devotees should come
to Vrndavana, you advised,
and renew their strength.
Balaram and Krishna will protect
the Krishna Conscious Movement
and its many bold preachers.
The devotee can renew his strength
and then go back
to fight the demons
in the attempt
to save the innocent of this world.
pp. 29-35
Prabhupada sometimes described Radharani as Krsna’s “tender-hearted female counterpart.” The easiest way to pray to Radharani is to address Her in the Hare Krsna mantra, which is made up of names of Radha and Krsna: “O energy of the Lord (Hara), O Lord, please engage me in Your service.”
Why, then, was Srila Prabhupāda so reserved and grave in speaking about Srimati Radharani? Prabhupāda was preaching in the West and since it is the nature of materialistic people to be engaged in illicit sex, they tend to take the conjugal affairs of Radha and Krsna as the material affairs between ordinary men and women. Prabhupāda once explained this by giving the example of a cow who had once been in a fire. Although the cow survived the fire, every time she saw the color red, she panicked and was reminded of the fire. Similarly, conditioned souls are so addicted to sex pleasure that as soon as they hear of Radha and Krsna, they think it is an expression of the same feelings they have for their own girlfriends.
Prabhupāda wanted to protect his followers from prakṛta-sahajiya, from taking confidential matters. cheaply. He told of the man who said, “Whenever I hear the name Radha, I always think of a barber’s wife whose name is Radha.”
We can get further insight into Srila Prabhupada’s presentation of Srimati Radharani by studying the lectures he gave on Radhastami. On August 30, 1968, in Montreal, Prabhupada explained that Radha-Krsna philosophy is a very great philosophy and is understood at the liberated stage, not at the conditioned stage:
So, in this vidhi-mārga, when you have no love for God or Krsna, you have to follow the regulative principles and automatically … there is practice. When practicing, just like you practice this mṛdaṅga playing, in the beginning it is not in order, but when you become well-versed in the practice, the sound will become so nice.
Similarly, when we are engaged by regulative principles in the worship of Radha-Krsna, that is called vidhi-marga. And actually, when you are on the love platform, that is called raga-marga. So, with vidhi-marga, if anyone wants to learn the raga-marga immediately, that is foolishness. That is foolishness. Nobody can pass MA examination without going through the regulative principles of primary schools and colleges.
Therefore, I do not indulge in the discussion of Radha and Krsna so easily. Rather, go on with the regulative principles at the present moment. Gradually as you become purified, as you become on the transcendental platform, you will understand what is Radha-Krsna.
Srila Prabhupāda was strict about not jumping ahead, but at the same time, he indicated that by following the path of vaidhī-bhakti, we would become elevated, just as regular practice on the mṛdaṅga would make us expert players.
Don’t try to understand Rādhā-Krsna very quickly. It is a very big subject. If we want to understand Rādhā-Krsna very quickly, then there will be so many prākṛta-sahajiyās. In India, there are prākṛta-sahajiyās. Just like Rādhā-Krsna dancing, Rādhā-Krsna has become a plaything. The painting Rādhā-Krsna, Krsna’s kissing Radharani, Rādhā is kissing. These are all nonsense. Rādhā-Krsna philosophy has to be understood by the liberated person, not by the conditioned soul. So, we shall await for the fortunate moment when we are liberated. Then we shall understand rādhā-Krsna praṇaya vikṛtir.
After that lecture, SrilaPrabhupāda then called for the harmonium and sang Rupa Gosvami’s song, “Sri Radhika-stava.” Although he was cautious, he was also willing to draw us into Her sweetness.
He explained that song as follows:
She is so dear to Krsna. Everyone is trying to love Krsna, but Krsna is trying to love somebody. How great She is. Just try to understand. The whole world, the whole universe, all living entities are trying to love Krsna. Krsna-prema. Krsna prema is so valuable, but Krsna is after Radharani. Just see how Radharani is great. Try to under the greatness of Radharani. She is so great, we have to offer our respect.
And how is She? Gokula-taruṇi-maṇḍala-mahite. Taruṇi means young girls. You will see the pictures. They are all young girls. She is the most beautiful. She is enchanting to the young girls also. She is so beautiful.
Damodara-rati-vardhana-vese. She always dresses Herself so nicely that Dāmodara Krsna becomes attracted by Her beauty.
She is the only lovable object of Krsna and She is the Queen of Vṛndāvana. You will find in Vṛndāvana, if you go to Vṛndavana, everyone is worshipping Radharani. Raṇi means queen. They are always speaking Jaya Radhe!’ Radharani. All the devotees in Vṛndāvana are worshipers of Radharani.
In another lecture, this time in Vṛndavana, 1972, Prabhupāda explained that there is no one as great as Krsna. Then he paused and said, “There is one person greater than Krsna. That is Radharani. But that is out of love.”
Prabhupāda taught us from the beginning, and then re-emphasized, that just as we desire to love and have pleasure, so that desire exists in the Supreme Person, Krsna. But when Krsna desires, He doesn’t desire pleasure from an ordinary person. He expands into the pleasure potency and that is Radharani. Therefore, Radharani is nondifferent from Krsna.
—Among Friends, Volume 2 #6 (1994
pp. 77-79
In A Passion for Truth, Heschel condemns the mediocre, compromising practice of religion. His words sound harsh to me because he seems to be selling short the importance of the Vaisnava’s mercy and the power of performing simple service in a happy mood. There’s even a hint of doubt in his negativity as to why a devotee can’t make the supreme effort to achieve surrender and give up all other pursuits except loving service to God. He doesn’t seem to be clear in his relationship with God, or else he is speculative, breaking new ground. We don’t break new ground; we say it’s all been charted by the munificent, expert, previous acaryas, especially those in the Caitanya sampradaya. Yes, we may be sunk in complacency and that’s not good, but what else can we do but continue to chant japa and to serve?
Grr, brr, be pardoned awhile. Tune in to the words will-ing to come, more than intellect or philosophy. Dance… I hear French out back of this van, young and old bodies. Do we have to leave here tonight because they don’t allow us out of the camp before 7:30 A.M.?
Leave trails and explosions like that. A little morning exercise. Keeping private, we will travel as if with some powder like gold or magic dust kept in a box. We open it occasionally, not like sniffing a drug or calling on a hallucination. Then? A mystic doctrine? A personal secret? A hope springing from the unconscious which you cannot even express?
Something . . . drive and park in gas station parking lots. Supply of new and used earplugs. So many things we use in our control, plug into, eat, “heart of the palm tree” and couscous.
Heart of the palm. Self, tongue, eating, scheduled routine. I don’t want to rip up anything, just tell my moral tales and skip
skip to m’ Lou.
It should be more interesting, a road book, and maybe less calm and with less continued train of thought. More outward adventure you will get. Maybe less daring at heart of honesty.
Grr, brr. He roots out. He used a bathroom on a ferry and will do it again. Restrain and control and go on planning and gobbling up the days and months and then you and all your brothers will leave your bodies. Your spiritual master did it and you will too. It’s as simple as that.
“We are impersonal and unfeeling in ISKCON,” he said. “Yes, yes,” I replied politely. We say this so often, it’s a cliché. I don’t even desire more loving friendships because how do you do it, in a mundane way based on what Scott Peck or Mr. Covey said?
Can’t buy me love,
etc.
they sang.
Love, love. I would like love of God, it seems, but I can’t pay the price. That significant verse—buy love of God in the market right away, but the price is laulyam, not attainable for many lives. That says it.
Here at least you pickax at it. Your feeble shovel digs at it. I don’t want love as they’re talking of it. I don’t want self-love, however, in a false ego sense.
Thought (still do)
that love would come down
like Buddha-sattva
while I chant and read
catching me unaware and
in meantime one is so busy
fending, keeping the bee
outside the van,
putting in earplugs, waiting
for another meal and ability
to travel to France and Ireland—it takes
all your attention sometimes and
you don’t concern yourself
with love of God.
The best I could do. The work I could do. At my architect’s planning desk and lamp, a feeble stroke here and there is not the master plan for the Mayapur temple and city or raising the money for it. Who has that conviction?
Krsna krsna krsna krsna he.
Verse II in Kings 3:15, “As the minstrel played, the spirit of God came upon him,” was rendered in this way by the Great Maggid:
When the minstrel was like the instrument—free of self-consciousness—the spirit of God came upon him. Only when, like the instrument, the minstrel is neither self-seeking nor self-conscious, can the spirit of God come upon him.
—A Passion for Truth, p. 136
pp. 175-78
Dear Prabhupada, I am trying to remember,
did I ever clean a dirty stove for you,
and crusted black pots, in a messed-up kitchen?
I know you asked Nandarani to scrub a pot
and she went into the bathroom tub,
wearing her Levis, scrubbed again and again
until you were satisfied that all the black was gone.
When Stryadhisa returned to you,
after some months of maya,
he cleaned the kitchen at 26 Second Avenue,
stacking all the pots and pans shining.
And you were pleased.
Yes, I did that too,
and you looked in and saw me.
I did it today,
self-consciously sloshing and scrubbing
while listening to you speak on tape:
“The sun takes away the duration of life
of everyone, but fails to do so
for one who listens to the messages
of Uttamasloka.”
You would see my essays
when they were published in
Back to Godhead; in your room you
read aloud
a couple of my 1966 poems
and said, “That’s nice”
to the one with the line,
“When we are chanting Hare Krsna
and the sun goes in and out,
I am afraid that I will be taken by Lord Indra
on a ride across the rainbow.”
And today, do you accept these labors?
Only because you were here
do we have your books—
they did not just drop from the sky.
But from your hand,
days and nights from your devout service,
writing and typing in Vrndavana and Delhi
and New York—”Science of Godhead,”
“Prayers of King Kulagekhara,”
“Back to Godhead Number 5.”
That photo of you in Easy Journey to Other Planets,
wrapped in khadi folds, round spectacles,
an upright smiling sadhu, a writer,
as yet unknown, the one who would come.
Because of you,
we are safely immersed in duties,
in the kitchen,
at the writer’s desk
working against the clock
on “a marathon” of one sort or another,
sixteen rounds, satisfied, lost within service to you,
with the world far behind us. That’s your gift to us.
And from here you say
we will see Krsna eye to eye.
It is comforting to think of you,
because you accept us despite
our falldowns; you just want us to chant
the Lord’s names, be servants
of your Guru Maharaja,
love the all-attractive Lord
and do not waste even a minute of time.
A kaleidoscope is a tube-shaped optical instrument that you rotate to produce symmetrical designs by means of mirrors that constantly change patterns made by bits of colored glass. Memories of being with Prabhupada sometimes appear like that. This seems to especially happen when you travel a lot, because you tend to shake up your identity and your consciousness. It is different than when staying in the same place and following the same routine.
But a kaleidoscope is abstract. When you look into it, you do not see a meadow and cows; you see all fragments of light, diamonds, and swirls and chips and sparks. When you shake it up again, hold it to the light and look in—there is another beautiful combination of fragmented colors. Similarly, I tend to get a jumble of images when I shake my “1966 kaleidoscope.”
A little flash of the movie, Happiness at Second Avenue—Swamiji playing the drum there. . . the artificial colors of that film. You see yourself also with shaved head. Everyone looks young, but not so pretty or handsome. It is realism, or maybe the nature of the film to make you look a little funny. There you are, and there is Swamiji playing the drum, reaching forward to get his karatalas.
When you look into the kaleidoscope, you see a lot of memory cans. You can look at them if you want. It is not an actual memory but a memory can that contains facsimile messages. It is something like that TV film, Happiness on Second Avenue, but this is your own film.
Here is a can: going into Swamiji’s worship room. You go in there, sit down, and Swamiji sits down. He puts on his tilaka and you put on your tilaka.
But as you look into these memories, you feel somewhat frustrated and even annoyed. You are almost sarcastic in describing it because it is “canned,” and they are only words. But I have tried to tell myself not to feel that way. Treat them tenderly. Know that at least some people do not mind hearing you say these things. Say it tenderly and lovingly, even if it is “just words.” The scriptures are also words. Vaisnavas do not say that words are inadequate. Even if they cannot completely capture something, words do a service. So have respect for them. Have respect for the words in the memories of Prabhupada. And accept what you see in the kaleidoscope.
We had grown up and broken away from our parents, gotten away from our country’s conformity and the US Navy and all that, but the new freedom couldn’t deliver us either. And the new jazz couldn’t deliver us. We were still homeless, unhappy. But now Swamiji was delivering us with the cleansing, cosmic vibration we barely understood. All we knew was that it was Krsna, and Krsna was far-out, and you could sing with Swami leading on the drum, Hare Krsna Hare Krsna, Krsna Krsna Hare Hare. Leave everything else behind.
pp. 75-79
Thoughts:
Progresso is an odd title. It was just to get a start.
Blooped devotees tell us how not to bloop. Be careful not to neglect your rounds, etc. The definite one reason they fall down? Hard to say, and even if you heard it, it wouldn’t necessarily prevent your own falldown. Sometimes these things are fated, it seems—part of the general misuse of free will.
Brahma prays for protection and Prabhupada comments:
“Unless one is sufficiently protected by the Lord, he may fall down from his spiritual position. Therefore one has to pray constantly to the Lord for protection and the blessing to carry out one’s duty.” (Bhag. 3.9.24, purport)
The duty of a writer is honesty, and it’s not wrong to find joy in that. But stick to Krsna consciousness.
Another point: don’t look for sensational forms of advancement or to become a bliss-tasting nectar hound. Just do something to please Lord Krsna and Srila Prabhupada. I’m trying to go deeper into what that means. It can’t stay an outer show and it can’t be forced on you by someone else. Surrender at the core of self and engage the whole self in His service.
It’s easier to write what I don’t want (neti neti)—all sorts of sense gratification and imaginary pleasures: a yacht on the Riviera, etc., summed up by na dhanam na janam na sundarim. This I can say positively: I don’t want to forget Krsna. Remember Him always.
So Brahma prays too.
Hickory dickory dock…
The time has come, the walrus said, to speak of many things…
Come to reason, come to sastra, come to serious service.
Srila Prabhupada, lecturing at a Ratha-yatra at Washington Square Park in 1976. He was not in good health, but he went out anyway and sustained our bliss. We were serious to do what he requested. As he spoke, a fanatical, so-called Christian started yelling. Someone pushed him into the shallow pond. Srila Prabhupada ended his talk requesting that “soberly and with calm head” you please consider Krsna consciousness. Nice request for all of us even today.
There is a stack of aging, heavy sweets in the second drawer in this room. Devotees have been sending them from Belfast, and I have been stacking them in that drawer. They’re not the best thing for me. If I eat them, I’ll get indigestion. We old-timers can’t get away with much in eating. Doesn’t matter how little you weigh, it’s still easy to overeat. So which is better, all day queasy or five minutes of tongue happiness? Come on, man, show some discretion.
The sweets I never ate and other righteous acts: a drama in five parts, starring . . . Raghunatha dasa Gosvami tasted hari-nama and radha-bhava, not white sugar or even honey on his tongue. I think I’ll give the maha sweets to Praghosa when he comes by this morning, and throw the old halava into the woods. Maybe the fox I saw last night will eat it and become liberated. I saw him sitting in the backyard at the edge of the forest scratching his head with rear paw just like a tame dog. O fox of the woods! You were so sleek and wild.
I’m alone and feeling restrained. To be unrestrained in love of God and sadhana practices is one of my goals. Please. I beg. I must remember Krsna even when I’m alone and certainly while writing. I want to save my heart for Govinda.
What is the charm in short lines when they bloom like flowers in a vase? Are they an offering of perpetual devotion?
I’m trying, but these flowers wilt although the flowers in Goloka bloom eternal.
My flowers are watered with my work and sweat and attempt to remain comprehensible
in three parts (beginning, middle, and
end), and to try on my own to say Krsna is lovely
Krsna is God
Krsna is best.
Out of harm’s way I write this on rising, asking dispensation. “Get rid of the sweets stash.” I don’t know if this little theme can carry me for the rest of the day, but if you take it in the broader sense, it means to get rid of all sense grat, restrain your senses. And “stash” means what you’ve hidden in your heart—those things you plan to enjoy in secret all for yourself, your private cache of vice and indulgence. Simplicity means to take what is offered and to depend on Krsna. That’s progress.
pp. 48-54
You are out of the mainstream of the sankirtana movement. Everything continues;. The marathon continues, the festivals continue, the fight between the demons and the devotees continues—but you are sidelined. You may hear about what’s happening, and some things you do not even hear about. You live in a small world where you chant a few rounds, read a little, sleep, and try to get better. But that is your holy service, and so you accept it in a humble way. Eventually you begin to feel something nice and sweet. There is an advantage you can feel in your reduced state. You are being humbled.
A temporary illness may be merely bothersome, or it can turn into a crisis in spiritual life whereby one loses his desire to perform devotional service. But even the most severe physical disease, when accepted in a Krsna conscious way, can bring many benefits.
What did Srila Prabhupada say about devotees’ illness? He was concerned and compassionate; he used to sign all his letters, “Hope this meets you in good health.” In Srila Prabhupada’s early letters, he often recommended home remedies for illness, and he suggested that devotees take good care of their bodies as instruments in Krsna’s service. “As you are sick with the flu now,” he wrote to a disciple in 1969, “I think it is best that you do not exert yourself by working top much strenuously but rather you rest as much as possible until you are feeling better.” (Letter, January 16, 1969)
In conditions where we cannot even chant properly, then our duty is to remain in good consciousness, as far as possible. Be peaceful, chant as much as you can, and hear about Krsna. When I was ill, some of my friends made recordings of themselves reading from Prabhupada’s books. I used to hear those tapes for many hours a day. It became an important service for me to stay awake and hear the readings. You learn to accept whatever little service you can do, and you treasure it.
While I was ill, I wrote this little poem:
My list of things to do
falls to the side.
All I do is rest.
But one cry to Krsna
is worth a hundred steps
of marching in pride.
Another consideration is whether you should pray to Lord Krsna for health. The desire to pray for Prabhupada’s health was shared by all devotees during his last year. We all wanted him to become well. He was not traveling, and he could not work full-time on his books. We heard that maybe he would leave this world, and so we wanted to pray to Krsna and make Prabhupada better. Prabhupada’s secretary remarked to Prabhupada, “Lord Balarama is so powerful, it wouldn’t be a difficult thing for him to make you well.” Prabhupada agreed that if Krsna desired he could get better. Devotees wrote to Prabhupada asking if they could exchange their youth and health for Prabhupada’s old age. Hearing their strong sentiments, Prabhupada permitted the devotees to pray to Krsna for his health. The prayer he gave us was, “My dear Lord Krsna, if You desire, please cure Srila Prabhupada.” (We may note the phrase, “If You desire”)
Should we use the full force of our faith to ask for physical health? Some religionists take it as a sign of their potency or faith in God that when they pray to Him in illness, He cures their physical disease. But Kona conscious devotees are not faith healers.
A devotee knows that he has become ill due to karma, or at least he is getting token reaction of karma. He wants to accept gladly whatever Krsna sends, and he tries to understand everything as Krsna’s plan. This is expressed in the Bhagavatam verse, tat te `nukampam su samiksamano . . .
My dear Lord, one who earnestly waits for You to bestow Your causeless mercy upon him, all the while patiently suffering the reactions of his past misdeeds and offering You respectful obeisances with his heart, words and body, is surely eligible for liberation, for it has become his rightful claim.
—Bhag. 10.14.8
When illness is prolonged or painful, we have to restrict ourselves from becoming depressed. Depression is another of maya’s tricks. Srila Prabhupada has described how a devotee should not indulge in depression.
Instead of employing enthusiasm for attaining material goals, one should be enthusiastic about achieving the perfectional stage of devotional service. Indeed, enthusing His devotees in devotional service is the purpose for which Krsna descends to this material world.
If one, however, becomes disappointed in his enthusiasm for serving the Supreme Lord, that disappointment must also be restricted.
The devotee should patiently follow the rules and regulations of devotional service so that the day will come when he will achieve, all of a sudden, all the perfection of devotional service.
—Narada-bhakti Sutra, Code 5, purport
All things considered, illness is misery. Lord Krsna says that we should tolerate bodily miseries which come and go like summer and winter seasons. We should maintain stability and go on with our duty to become Krsna conscious. We should not become critical of those who find fault with us, and neither should we fall in lethargy. Even if our duties are simply those of the sickbed, we can keep the bed clean, and go through the routine activities of illness in a way that is conducive to the modes of goodness. Although we cannot cure our physical illness, we can remain cheerful as we follow our very limited program. If our duty is to tolerate miseries and to chant a little bit each day—and to accept the fact that we are each a tiny devotee—then this is the challenge we have to meet. This is how we can cope with the misery of physical disease.
To Śrīla Prabhupāda, who encouraged his devotees (including me) To write articles and books about Kṛṣṇa Consciousness.
I wrote him personally and asked if it was alright for his disciples to write books, Since he, our spiritual master, was already doing that. He wrote back and said that it was certainly alright For us to produce books.
I have a personal story to tell. It is a about a time (January–July 1974) I spent as a personal servant and secretary of my spiritual master, His Divine Grace A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupäda, founder-äcärya of the International Society for Krishna Consciousness. Although I have written extensively about Çréla Prabhupäda, I’ve hesitated to give this account, for fear it would expose me as a poor disciple. But now I’m going ahead, confident that the truth will purify both my readers and myself.
First published by The Gītā-nāgarī Press/GN Press in serialized form in the magazine Among Friends between 1996 and 2001, Best Use of a Bad Bargain is collected here for the first time in this new edition. This volume also contains essays written by Satsvarūpa dāsa Goswami for the occasional periodical, Hope This Meets You in Good Health, between 1994 and 2002, published by the ISKCON Health and Welfare Ministry.
This book has two purposes: to arouse our transcendental feelings of separation from a great personality, Śrīla Prabhupāda, and to encourage all sincere seekers of the Absolute Truth to go forward like an army under the banner of His Divine Grace A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupāda and the Kṛṣṇa consciousness movement.
A single volume collection of the Nimai novels.
Śrīla Prabhupāda was in the disciplic succession from the Brahmā-Mādhva-Gauḍīya sampradāya, the Vaiṣṇavas who advocate pure devotion to God and who understand Kṛṣṇa as the Supreme Personality of Godhead. He always described himself as simply a messenger who carried the paramparā teachings of his spiritual master and Lord Kṛṣṇa.
Dear Srila Prabhupada,
Please accept this or it’s worse than useless.
You have given me spiritual life
and so my time is yours.
You want me to be happy in Krishna consciousness
You want me to spread Krishna consciousness,
This collection of Satsvarūpa dāsa Goswami’s writings is comprised of essays that were originally published in Back to Godhead magazine between 1966 and 1978, and compiled in 1979 by Gita Nagari Press as the volume A Handbook for Kṛṣṇa Consciousness.
This second volume of Satsvarūpa dāsa Goswami’s Back to Godhead essays encompasses the last 11 years of his 20-year tenure as Editor-in-Chief of Back to Godhead magazine. The essays in this book consist mostly of SDG’s ‘Notes from the Editor’ column, which was typically featured towards the end of each issue starting in 1978 and running until Mahārāja retired from his duties as editor in 1989.
This collection of Satsvarupa dasa Goswami’s writings is comprised of essays that were originally published in Back to Godhead magazine between 1991 and 2002, picking up where Volume 2 leaves off. The volume is supplemented by essays about devotional service from issues of Satsvarupa dasa Goswami’s magazine, Among Friends, published in the 1990s.
“This is a different kind of book, written in my old age, observing Kṛṣṇa consciousness and assessing myself. I believe it fits under the category of ‘Literature in pursuance of the Vedic version.’ It is autobiography, from a Western-raised man, who has been transformed into a devotee of Kṛṣṇa by Śrīla Prabhupāda.”
The Best I Could DoI want to study this evolution of my art, my writing. I want to see what changed from the book In Search of the Grand Metaphor to the next book, The Last Days of the Year.
a Hare Krishna ManIt’s world enlightenment day
And devotees are giving out books
By milk of kindness, read one page
And your life can become perfect.
Calling Out to Srila Prabhupada: Poems and PrayersO Prabhupāda, whose purports are wonderfully clear, having been gathered from what was taught by the previous ācāryas and made all new; O Prabhupāda, who is always sober to expose the material illusion and blissful in knowledge of Kṛṣṇa, may we carefully read your Bhaktivedanta purports.
I use free-writing in my devotional service as part of my sādhana. It is a way for me to enter those realms of myself where only honesty matters; free-writing enables me to reach deeper levels of realization by my repeated attempt to “tell the truth quickly.” Free-writing takes me past polished prose. It takes me past literary effect. It takes me past the need to present something and allows me to just get down and say it. From the viewpoint of a writer, this dropping of all pretense is desirable.
Geaglum Free WriteThis edition of Satsvarūpa dāsa Goswami’s 1996 timed book, Geaglum Free Write Diary, is published as part of a legacy project to restore Satsvarūpa Mahārāja’s writings to ‘in print’ status and make them globally available for current and future readers.